DaYs OF My LiFe :-)

2006-08-26T17:30:00.000+08:00

My nu peng you today very naughty.. =.=

Today was supposed to wake up at 8.30am to go for performance at woodlands library.. In the end i woke up at 9.30am coz my stupid phone date is set at friday and the alarm is set at saturday.. =.= WTH sia.. In the end rush to WL library straight away.. Forgot to bring some of my stuffs for performance.. ZzZ..

And today supposed to meet nu peng you at the library de... But i 11.30am msg nu peng you to see if she has woke up anot, she didnt reply.. Den 1pm i msg her again to tell her when she woke up den call me.. But again she didnt reply.. So i tot she was still sleeping.. Den abt 2pm she called me.. Here's our conversation over the phone..

Me: Yoz.. U jus woke up ah?

Her:(noisy background) Urmm.. (sleepy tone) Yah~... Where r u?

Me: At woodlands library.. I finished performance le lehz.. I go ur house meet u?

Her: (sleepy tone) HuH.. No need la..

Me: HuH?~

Her: (sleepy tone fading off) Eh.. Wait i call u back.. I got 2nd line..

Me: Ok..

Tis is the first part of the conversation.. I wasnt thinking too much while toking to her.. I presume tat she really jus woke up.. I was sadded coz she say no need me go her house meet her.. Usually she will say ok wan.. So i was kinda waiting for her to call me.. Den she called..

Her: Hello..

Me: Yoz..

Her: Look in front of u..

Me: What the hell?!..(shocked)

She is standing infront of me, looking straight at my direction.. =.=
She so naughty la.. Make me think tat she really woke up late.. ZzZ.. Kaoz..
But she very good.. She make honey drink for me coz my cough is quite bad and i've been coughing for the past 1 week.. =X

After meeting her, we went to CWP to eat first den i send her to work at orchard.. =D
She ah.. Make me sad den make me happy.. =.=

Now my turn to disturb her.. Haha.. Found some pics to post.. LOLxX.. Some of the pics she may ask me to take away de.. But since she disturb me tis morning, its payback time now.. Muahahahaha... =D

Nu peng you Slurping away.. haha.. Taken today..

Nu peng you Cut hair tat time.. Scary look la.. =.= But to me its funny.. haha..

Tis is the Photo tat she dun wan me to post coz she say ugly.. Haha.. But i dun think so lehz.. =D Date of tis photo is 16/05/2006.. Haha.. I started to lik her 1 or 2 weeks b4 tis photo was taken.. =X Haha..

Went to eat Suki Sushi @ Parkway.. Finally Dar kept her promise.. =.= Haha.. Ate quite alot.. =X

No idea when tis was taken.. Was shocked went i saw tis photo in my hp.. =.=

Nu peng you's Slippers seems lik its bursting.. Haha..

Nu peng You =D~~

2006-08-23T11:11:00.000+08:00

When I first saw you,

I was scared to talk to you.

When I first talked to you,

I was scared to kiss you.

When I first kissed you,

I was scared to love you.

Now that I love you,

I'm scared to lose you.

2006-08-19T10:02:00.000+08:00

2006-08-19T09:43:00.000+08:00

I have been tagged.. =.= And i've no idea y m i doin tis.. =.=

Once you've been tagged, you have to write a blog with 6 weird facts/things/habits about yourself, saying who tagged you. In the end you need to choose the 5 people to be tagged and list their names. No tag backs.

INSTRUCTIONS:
1. Do the following without complaining.(HOW CAN I ??? IT'S 12AM!!!)
2. Choose 5 people to do this after you've completed yours.
3. Leave a tag on the person's tagboard to say that he/she has been tagged.
4. Start your post with "I have been tagged!" then do this.

FAVOURITES:
color: black and baby blue
food: Sushi~ Unagi~ Tako~ Jap Crusines
songs: too many to mention
movie: Too many le.. All the movies i watch are good movies.. Haha..
sport: Basketball, ice skating and sleeping...
day of the week: Monday to Thursday!!!
season: Winter
ice-cream: Gelare, Gelestismo, Yumi Yoghurt, BENS and JERRYS!!!! Many many more..

CURRENT:
mood: Super DUPER HAPPY LA!!!! =D
taste: don't know ..
clothes: Top Less wif Secondary School PE shorts.. =.=
desktop: Helen and the Baby Fox wallpaper..
time: 0949
surroundings: Loads of rubbish
annoyance: My stupid noisy fan.. =.=

FIRSTS:
best friend: Alot..
crush: Xing Er?.. Maybe..
movie: Dunno.. =X
music: How would i remember tat? 0.o

LASTS:
cigarette: Long ago.. =X
drink: Plain water
ride: Bus 161
movie: Ghost Game.. Wahahaha...
phone call: Hui Lian.. =D
CD: Westlife? 0.o

HAVE YOU EVER:
dated one of your best friends: Got.. It sucked.. =.=
been arrested: Ya.. =.=
skinny-dipped: Nope.. Dunno wad the hell is tat.. =.=
been on tv: Ya.. Forgot for wad le.. =.=
kissed someone you don't know: Nope.. Im not so mad.. =.=

THINGS:
4 things you did today: Went into frenzy when Hui Lian told me something, Sleep, Went toilet and use laptop.. =X
sounds you can hear right now: My stupid fan and the sound of me typing tis sencetance.. zZz..

the Chosen Five to do this!
1) Hui Lian
2) Agnes
3)
4)
5)

2006-08-06T16:30:00.000+08:00

Suddenly i feel so useless.. So unwanted.. So alone.. I dunno is these the exact feelings im feeling now, but its tat there is so much on my mind now.. I oso dunno wad's up in my mind.. So fustrated now.. Arghh!! Can die sia.. Probably im extremely bored.. I recently felt so foolish.. Keep on doin things tat are pointless.. Arghhh!!! Haiz.. Sometimes i feel so selfish.. Dunno la.. Haiz.. Damn it.. I so freaking hate my head.. =.= Im jus typing crap here coz i jus realise tat my blog has not been updated for a very long time.. Thanks Long for accompanying me in msn..

Headache.. =(
Off to do housework.. Haiz..

2006-08-03T13:51:00.000+08:00

Today was quite alright.. Been fed up wif my phone for being so laggy.. And thanks to my phone's lagness, all my saved messages have been gone!! ARGH!!!! Damn it.. So pissed..
Today's module so hard sia.. I dun lik it sia.. So difficult..
Lian ah Lian.. If i read ur msg earlier i oso wan pon.. =.= Haiyo

I cant wait for tis semester to end.. Im waiting for the day to come.. Somehow, i fear for the coming of the day.. But i still wan it to come.. Guess i might not be me aft end of sem.. Haiz.. Scary.. Dun lik tis kind of scary feeling.. haiz..

Dun destroy me~ T.T

2006-08-01T21:58:00.000+08:00

I feel so happy wif u around me.. Im so afriad tat one day u will be tired of me and leave me.. Im scared of so many things.. How can i care more for u? I hope tat u will not be tired of me.. I dunno wad will happen to me if u are gone.. How to be someone u'll lik? I wanna be a person tat u'll lik so i can feel secure.. Haha.. I feel so stupid thinking of such things.. But.. It jus happened to cross my mind and i really do feel tis way.. LoLxX.. I miss u.. Plz take care of urself~ =X

2006-07-29T21:30:00.000+08:00

I miss u so much today.. Although had fun today.. But was thinking abt u.. Do u feel the same way too? I dun think so.. I didnt expect u to think the same way as me.. Haha.. I feel so dead now.. Dead beat.. So tired.. Today was fun coz i get to go to the National Stadium VIP room, where all the MP's and Generals are.. Perform for them.. Its so cool.. The view there is so cool too.. Quite happy.. But was not all tat enjoyable.. =X

Tired le.. I m goin to rest.. Blog more other days..

2006-07-28T11:03:00.000+08:00

I noe tat i shouldn't feel tis way..

But its something i cant control..

I jus happened to feel tis way..

I dun wan to be lik tis too.. But..

I can't CONTROL it!!!

Arghh!!

Damn!

I HATE MYSELF!!!!

Pissed wif me and me myself..

2006-07-27T13:12:00.000+08:00

Perfect love is rare indeed - for to be a lover will require that you continually have the subtlety of the very wise, the flexibility of the child, the sensitivity of the artist, the understanding of the philosopher, the acceptance of the saint, the tolerance of the scholar and the fortitude of the certain. - Unknown Person

Very true indeed.. But there is no such thing as perfect love.. We, as human beings and only strive to be as perfect as we can be.. It take great effort to love, but at the same time, it is oso effort less.. Tat is y love is so contridicting..

Love and magic have a great deal in common. They enrich the soul, delight the heart. And they both take practice. - Nora Roberts

I think tat tis quote is very practical and true.. A magician's ultimate aim is to bring joy to his audiences and to entertain them.. To entertain people, he/she needs practice.. Lots and Lots of practice.. Its the same as love..

We can do no great things; only small things with great love. - Mother Teresa

I personally feel tat Mother Teresa is a great inspiration for everyone.. She showed unconditional love for everyone she met, and helped everyone who needs her help.. She is a person whom we all can learn from.. Another kind of love.. Unconditional love..

People who are sensible about love are incapable of it. - Douglas Yates

I find tis quote rather funny.. Haha.. For those of u who dunno wad it means, i meant tat those who fall in love, are mostly blind and cannot think properly.. In layman terms, its saying tat those who fall in love annot think coz they are blinded by love.. I feel tat We are blinded by love to a certain extent.. Some people are totally blinded.. Some ppl chose to be partially blinded.. I choose to be partially blinded.. =X

Can there be a love which does not make demands on its object? - Confucius

Good question by Confucius.. Ask him to refer to the first quote.. Haha..

Love is not blind, it sees more not less;But because it sees more it chooses to see less.

See.. I told u love is not blind.. haha.. I choose to see less.. Not blinded.. Wahahahaha..

To fear love is to fear life, and those who fear life are already three parts dead. - Bertrand Russell

Tis is to tell those who are afriad to love again bcoz of previous failed relationships to be aware of those who still care for them.. Dun be afriad to try again.. Lik me.. Im trying now.. But there is still fear within me.. Fear of failure.. =X But im trying to ignore tat fear.. Coz love is great.. =X haha..

Tis is the end of a long long long post.. Haha..

2006-07-27T01:05:00.000+08:00

"You walk by me everyday and say hello.Everyday you take time out to listen to me.You talk to me, smile at me, laugh with me, and have fun with me.Well, I talk, smile and laugh too, but inside I'm hurting.Deep down it hurts to be with you because I love you and you are only a friend."

"Love is giving someone the ability to destroy you, but trusting them not to."

I've already gave u the ability to destroy me.. U've broken into all of my defences and see the true me.. Its either an embrace tat u will giv me or a stab in the heart.. The beginning or the ~~ending~~ is urs to create..

Deep down i hope its a beginning tat u will create.. Coz i cannot let u go.. I've developed a feeling tat is too strong for me to let go.. =X

As time is passing day by day.. The scarier it gets.. I wish time would time pass faster but another half of me wished tat time would slow to a crawl.. Coz i do not wan to be destroyed.. I wan to be happy.. =X

難以忘記初次見你
一雙迷人的眼睛　
在我腦海裡　
你的身影　揮散不去　
握你的雙手感覺你的溫柔　
真的有點透不過氣　
你的天真　我想珍惜　
看到你受委屈　我會傷心

只怕我自己會愛上你　
不敢讓自己靠得太近　
怕我沒什麼能夠給你　
愛你也需要很大的勇氣　
只怕我自己會愛上你　
也許有天會情不自禁　
想念只讓自己苦了自己　
愛上你是我情非得已

什麼原因　我竟然又會遇見你我真的真的不願意　就這樣陷入愛的陷阱

愛上你是我情非得已

2006-07-26T11:54:00.000+08:00

Arghhh!!.. I need to stop being too sticky to ppl.. Arghhh!!.. HOw??.. I must not be so sticky.. So scary la.. I dun wan to be so sticky too.. But my subconscious is making me lik the way i m now.. Arghhh.. I noe its not good.. Arghhh!!.. Stupid brain.. =.=

Somehow or rather, i must gib ppl the freedom they deserve.. I must control myself.. I feel tat y i will stick to someone is because i wan to be wif the person alot and hope to see the person whenever i had the chance.. But its jus not very good.. Coz i need to think abt the other person's feelings.. I have to slowly learn.. As tis is the first time i've experienced tis kind of me.. I did not feel tis kind of feelings b4.. I must not be too extreme.. I dun wan becoz of me being sticky den end up spoiling everything.. Haiz.. DIE~ T.T

I will learn to compromise.. As tis is wad its all abt.. We must learn to compromise one another.. I'll try my best de..

2006-07-25T13:52:00.000+08:00

Dunno wad to update lehz.. So many things to write.. Tomolo goin to NDP media brief.. Haha.. gonna be famous.. LOLxX.. Hopefully la.. Haha..

Something interesting tat happened during sunday.. Haha.. I played arcade the punching machine.. The one where by u can have ur photo taken by the machine den u can whack urself wan.. Haha.. Imagine i whack about 80+ dmg each den when coming to the last hit, which need another 90 more dmg to win, the machine broke down during the last hit.. Haha.. I hit den the machine suddenly changed black and says "Sensor Error".. Haha.. Imagine there r about 10 ppl looking at me hit it, den suddenly the sensor error.. Haha.. Maybe i hit it too hard ba.. =X At first i was scared to play wan.. Coz alot ppl were playing den alot ppl were looking.. So pai seh la.. They hit all 60+ to 90+.. Den i dun wan xia sway ma.. So dun dare play.. Den finally when i dare to play, the stupid machine got the error.. Haiyo.. Haha... If not i sure can clear de.. LOL.. I tot i cant even hit 60+, but who noes.. haha.. At least i noe im not tat weak.. LOLxX..

Monday pon sch.. Haha.. Went to magic lecture conducted by Jeremy Pei.. Fun sia.. But i wished tat the lecture was on other days.. Haiz.. Spoil my whole day programme.. Sianz la.. So bad timing.. ZzZ.. So sad la.. haiz.. but monday is so beautiful.. I love my monday.. =D

I miss u much much.. T.T
I need to rest frm playing bball.. My right leg seriously hurt.. Everyday wake up cannot walk properly.. Need to walk and walk, warm up den can walk normally.. Pain la!!! Arghhh!! Die la.. Keep on pain.. haiz..

Alot of things cannot write.. LoL.. Dun wan write le.. Next time ba.. 30 more days!!!

Damn it sia.. Y my classmates so many immature wan? Dun they feel tat somethings cant be said? Are they BRAINLESS or plain DUMB? As*hole! Say tat again and try me.. Ur lucky Lian is not offended by wad u said.. Damn it.. U freaking not happy come la.. I wait for u.. Wan to F*ck around wif me? Think again.. Freak!

2006-07-21T15:25:00.000+08:00

Went home during the 2 break out.. Was really bored.. No one talked to me at all.. Its lik im so transparent.. All i had was my songs and me.. Sat on the table alone, listening to my songs.. I dun to be transparent.. I hate the feeling.. Today i seriously hoped tat someone would tok to me.. But no.. It was always me who had to go msn and tok to ppl.. Arghh!! Hate iT!!

Back home now.. Here is where i can be lonely for all i care.. Throw myself on the bed and reflect on everything.. Stop my heart from beating, close my eyes and wither away lik no one's business.. Haiz..

Im not well.. Im goin insane.. Or so i think..

2006-07-21T12:00:00.000+08:00

Wow.. Im goin to NDP 06 MediaBrief.. Dunno wad is tat but it sure sounds lik a big event.. MAybe may even make it to the news.. Wahhahaha.. Day dreaming.. =.=

I need to improve my performing skills.. I need to ovecome my fear of failing.. Damn.. I need courage to approach audience.. Come on man.. Gib me the confidence!!! Arghh!!

Next..Another 34 more days to go.. Must wait.. Must wait.. Fear is in the eye of the beholder.. Can u see the fear within me? Fear is ntg but fear itself.. Do i fear myself? I fear tat i have no confidence.. Im afriad i can meet up to ur requirements.. Am i good enough for u? Tis questions is always on my mind.. Bugging me day and night.. When im wif u, i feel so blessed.. Its lik even if we were to ever not talk much when together, i still feel so happy to have u beside me.. But being the crappy person i m, im sure i tok alot de.. Haha.. I can be very happy for a moment and be sad for a moment.. Small little things tat u do will make me so happy.. But little things tat u say can also make me feel very bad.. Maybe im insane already.. =X

Am i MAD? Haha.. =P

2006-07-20T10:20:00.000+08:00

Your Five Variable Love Profile

Propensity for Monogamy:
Your propensity for monogamy is high.You find it easy to be devoted and loyal to one person.And in return, you expect the same from who you love.Any sign of straying, and you'll end things.
Experience Level:
Your experience level is medium.You probably have had a couple significant loves.And you may have even had your heart broken.But you haven't really dated a wide variety of people.
Dominance:
Your dominance is medium.You tend to be the one with more power.You aren't a total control freak in relationships..But of course you don't mind getting you way!
Cynicism:
Your cynicism is low.You are an eternal optimist when it comes to love and romance.No matter how many times you've been hurt - you're never bitter.You believe in one true love, your perfect soulmate.And if you haven't found true love yet, you know you will soon.
Independence:
Your independence is low.This doesn't mean you're dependent in relationships..It does mean that you don't have any problem sharing your life.In your opinion, the best part of being in love is being together.

The Five Variable Love Test

2006-07-20T10:05:00.000+08:00

TIRED!!

Im so tired.. Tired of thinking so much.. Its not tat i wan to think.. Im so scared la..

I can feel the heart pain now.. Even b4 it started to happen.. Haha.. =X

I wan to win tis gamble.. Been losing too many times already.. Im gonna put in all my effort to change her.. Yeah.. Tat's wad i'll do.. Treat her lik she's already wif me.. Haha.. She might be reading tis.. So its oso meant for her to see.. Haha.. Im sure she oso noe de la.. =X Blah!

Did 2 test.. Funny results.. But seems true la.. Haha..

2006-07-20T09:58:00.000+08:00

The Five Love Languages

My primary love language is probably
Physical Touch
with a secondary love language being
Quality Time.

Complete set of results

Physical Touch:		11
Quality Time:		8
Acts of Service:		5
Words of Affirmation:		5
Receiving Gifts:		1

Information

Unhappiness in relationships, according to Dr. Gary Chapman, is often due to the fact that we speak different love languages. Sometimes we don't understand our partner's requirements, or even our own. We all have a "love tank" that needs to be filled in order for us to express love to others, but there are different means by which our tank can be filled, and there are different ways that we can express love to others.

Take the quiz

2006-07-20T00:49:00.000+08:00

Time is passing so slow.. Haiz.. Y cant it pass faster? I think i need to retake one of my module..
My analogue electronics i bound to fail.. DIE!!!.. Tomolo got magic meeting for those who fail the initial entry test.. Now tomolo must help those who fail.. Sianz.. Days, hours, mins, seconds passes.. But all seems so slow.. I cant stop thinking.. Mood changes with a wink of an eye.. Tats how fast my mood changes.. I dun lik the feeling of insecurities.. But who does? Everyone doesnt lik insecurities, but its jus tat some ppl can cope very well wif insecurities.. But the fact is tat i cant.. Haiz.. Hate life.. Shit happens all the time.. And it seems lik life is playing a fool of ppl lik me.. =.=
Why do i always think so much? Issit bcoz i've always been a failure and i neber wan to fail again? But if tis is so, why do i still take the risk? Issit bcoz no pain, no gain? Everytime it seems lik a gamble.. 50-50% chances.. Either u win or u lose.. Its always the 2 extreme.. But the thing tat is different is tat when u are gambling, u can choose the stakes u wish to bet.. But toking abt relationships, i can only gib in 100%.. Im always thinking, wad can i do to make myself feel better, wad can i do to take my mind of these things?.. But i have no solution so far.. I dun wan to be a person in history.. In fact, i neber wan to be anyone's history... I've constantly been thinking, wad will happen if i get rejected again?.. Wad will i do? Can i cope? Its not always easy to start all over again.. But when a person is used to starting all over again, he/she finds tat its much peaceful.. Time is a great healer of heart aches..' Ya rite~' As if thinking of tis quote will make u feel better.. =.= I hope my tis gamble will be a victory.. I dun wan to be in history..

"Never lose hope in the person you choose to love...Even she would always be the reason why your heart ache, who cares? She'd still be the reason why your heart beat."

2006-07-18T09:28:00.000+08:00

Im so sorry.. I shouldn't have loss my cool.. After talking to u i feel so bad.. Im so afriad it'll somehow affect ur decision making.. But all i can say is tat im really really very sorry.. Yesterday i felt so useless.. Only could say sorry but couldn't make u feel any better.. Luckily, we did talked abt it.. At least u understand how i felt tat day and there isn't any misunderstandings.. =X

I felt so scared the whole day after the incident.. I'll neber be fierce to u.. I dun wan to hurt u.. I really regret wad i've said tat night.. I wan u to understand i cant carry on without u.. Thanks for understanding me..I've always been thinking abt the past times we went out and enoy ourselves.. I dun ever wan tat to be jus in the past.. I wan to enjoy being wif u now and in the future..

"Love has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get, it's what you are expected to give -- which is everything."

"The entire sum of existence is the magic of being needed by just one other person."

"If you have love in your life it can make up for a great many things you lack. If you don't have it, no matter what else there is, it's not enough."

"Love and kindness are never wasted. They always make a difference. They bless the one who receives them, and they bless you, the giver."

"Love is patient, love is kind.
It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
It is not rude, it is not self-seeking.
It is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails. " - The Holy Bible 1st Corinthians 13:4-8 ( i lik tis the most..)

2006-07-16T23:03:00.000+08:00

Actually i wanted to update my blog for a very very very long time already.. But somehow i
felt tat tis blog of mine has too many ppl reading and sometimes wad i write may not be too
confidential.. I got lots of feelings to express but didnt know how to write it out..
Many many things happened these past weeks.. I was busy performing for NDP preview.. And
i've missed out on 2 weeks of bball coz of NDP.. Sianz sia..
I appreciate the things you've done for me.. I enjoy being wif u every sec.. I neber wan to
lose some as precious as u.. U are too close to my heart for me to lose.. I really cant
imagine life without u and im too used to having u in my life.. I dun wan to think too much
abt the future becoz i wan u to remember tat no one can predict the future.. Not even me or you..
I sometimes feel tat im not worth ur feelings towards me.. I jus feel tat u deserve much
better.. Tat is y i try to gib u all the best tat i can offer..
U make me wanna totally forget all abt my past and cherish the moment we have together
now.. But will u ever be mine?.. I seriously am afriad of losing u.. I've lost one person
tat i loved b4 and i do not ever wanna live through tat past again..

2006-07-16T01:09:00.000+08:00

You Are An ENFP

The Inspirer
You love being around people, and you are deeply committed to your friends.
You are also unconventional, irreverant, and unimpressed by authority and rules.
Incredibly perceptive, you can usually sense if someone has hidden motives.
You use lots of colorful language and expressions. You're qutie the storyteller!
You would make an excellent entrepreneur, politician, or journalist.

http://www.blogthings.com/whatsyourpersonalitytypequiz/">What's Your Personality Type?

2006-07-13T09:46:00.000+08:00

You Are A Fig Tree

You are very independent and strong minded.A hard worker when you want to be, you play hard too.You are honest and loyal. You hate contradiction or arguments.You love life, and you live for your friends, children, and animals.A great sense of humor, artistic talent, and intelligence are all gifts you possess.

What's" Your Celtic Horoscope?

2006-07-02T13:46:00.000+08:00

From Priscila's Journal.. Lots of meaningful stuffs in her Journal.. =X

"I love you, not only for who you are, but for what I am when I am with you." - Roy Croft

"I tell you I love you every day for fear that tomorrow isn't another."

"If i know what love is, it is because of you."

"When i saw you, i fell in love, and you smiled because you knew." - William Shakespeare

"To be your friend was all i ever wanted;
to be your lover was all i ever dreamed."(This is the quote i really Liked~!)

and thiss...

Listen for Love

There are times when we are timid and shy about expressing the love we feel. For fears of embarrassing the other person, or yourselves, we hesitate to say the actual words “I love you.” So we try to communicate the idea in other words.

We say ‘take care’ or ‘don’t drive too fast’ or ‘be good’. But really, these are just other ways of saying ‘I love you,’ ‘you are important to me,’ ‘I care what happens to you,’ ‘I don’t want you to get hurt.’

We are sometimes very strange people. The only thing we want to say, and the one thing that we should say, is the one thing we don’t say. And yet, because the feeling is so real, and the need to say it is so strong, we are driven to use other words and signs to say what we really mean. And many times the meaning never gets communicated at all and the other person is left feeling unloved and unwanted.

Therefore, we have to LISTEN FOR LOVE in the words that people are saying to us. Sometimes the explicit words are necessary, but more often, the manner of saying things is even more important. A joyous insult carries more affection and love within the sentiments which are expressed insincerely.

An impulsive hug says I LOVE YOU even though the words might be saying very different. Any expression of a person’s concern for another says I love you. Sometimes the expression is clumsy, sometimes even cruel. Sometimes we must look and listen very intently for the love that contains. But it is often there, beneath the surface

A mother may nag her son constantly about this grades or cleaning his room. The son may hear only the nagging, but if he listens carefully, he will hear the love underneath the nagging. His mother wants him to do well, to be successful. Her concern and love for her son unfortunately emerge in her nagging. But it is love all the same.

A daughter comes home late, way past her curfew, and her father confronts her with angry words. The daughter may hear only the anger, but if she listens carefully, she will hear the love under the anger. “I was worried about you,” the father is saying. “Because I care about you and I love you. You are important to me.”

We say I love you in many ways – with birthday gifts, and little notes, with smiles and sometimes with tears. Sometimes we show our love by just keeping quiet and not saying a word, at other times by speaking out, even brusquely.

We show our love sometimes by impulsiveness. Many times we have to show our love by forgiving someone who has not listened to the love we have tried to express.

The problem is listening for love is that we don’t always understand the language of love which the other person is using.

A girl may use tears or emotions to say what she wants to say, and her boyfriend may not understand her because he expects her to be talking his language. Thus, we have to force ourselves to really listen for love.

The problem with our world is that people rarely listen to each other. They hear the words, but they don’t listen to the actions that accompany the words or the expression on the face. Or people listen only for rejection or misunderstanding. They do not see the love that is there just beneath the surface, even if the words are angry.

We have to listen for love in those around us. If we listen intently we will discover that we are a lot more loved than we realize. Listen for love and we will find that the world is a very loving place after all.

LOVE is a happy thing
It makes us laugh
It makes us sing
It makes us sad
It makes us cry
It makes us seek the reason why
It makes us take
It makes us give
Above all else, it makes us LIVE

It is not the presence or absence of people that males the difference because a person need not be lonely even if he is along. Sometimes it is good to be alone. But that does not make us lonely. It is not a matter of being present WITH someone. It is a matter of being present to someone.

So remember…
If you love someone, tell them. Remember always to say what you mean. Never be afraid to express yourself. Take this opportunity to tell someone what they mean to you. Seize the day and have no regrets.

Most importantly, stay close to your friends and family, for they have helped make you the person that you are today and are what it’s all about anyway.

2006-06-29T19:32:00.000+08:00

How You Are In Love

You take a while to fall in love with someone. Trust takes time.

You tend to take more than give in relationships.

You tend to get very attached when you're with someone. You want to see your love all the time.

You're secretly hoping your partner will change for you.

You stay in love for a long time, even if you aren't loved back. When you fall, you fall hard.

How Are You In Love?

Your True Love Is a Capricorn

Why you'll love a Capricorn:

Hard working and driven, a Capricorn will work overtime to win your heart.
Be prepared to get wined and dined, even once you're convince that your Capricorn is the one!

Why a Capricorn will love you:

You don't rush things. You know it will take a while for a Capricorn to trust you, and you can wait.
Social and outgoing, you can introduce normally shy Capricorn to a great circle of friends.

What Sign Is Your True Love?

People Envy Your Ingenuity

You're a person with unique ideas, big plans, and a zany outlook on life. Many people look to you for inspiration.
People envy your creativity and "who cares?" attitude. They feel very ordinary next to you - and they usually are!

What Do People Envy About You?

You Have a Choleric Temperament

You are a person of great enthusiasm - easily excited by many things.
Unsatisfied by the ordinary, you are reaching for an epic, extraordinary life.
You want the best. The best life. The best love. The best reputation.

You posses a sharp and keen intellect. Your mind is your primary weapon.
Strong willed, nothing can keep you down. Your energy can break down any wall.
You're an instantly passionate person - and this passion gives you an intoxicating power over others.

At your worst, you are a narcissist. Full of yourself and even proud of your faults.
Stubborn and opinionated, you know what you think is right. End of discussion.
A bit of a misanthrope, you often see others as weak, ignorant, and inferior.

What Temperment Are You?

2006-06-27T10:25:00.000+08:00

I've always wanted to be outstanding in whatever i wanna do.. I've always wanted to be good at playing basketball.. Wanted to be the top student.. Wanted to experience teenage BGR.. Wanted to be a great magician.. Wanted attention.. But after all these years till now, im almost past my teenage years but still have not achieved any freaking shit!

Everytime i think abt my past i jus help but feel freaking FUCK UP! Yeah.. Its really freaking fucked up shit.. Life keeps goin on and shit keeps happening.. Been thinking of these questions.. Y issit so that we are surrounded by so many people and still feel lonely.. What is it tat we want in life? Wad is the meaning of life? Im jus so tired of living.. If i were to suffer from some terminal illness, i seriously dun feel lik carrying on living.. It really sucked to the core man.. If there is life after death, i rather live my life in the other world.. Perhaps i'll be more happy den wad i am now.. Coz in heaven no one is lonely.. Everybody is happy and there is nothing more that we can ask for in heaven.. Everything is provided for.. If u have time, take time to listen to tis music video..

2006-06-22T14:40:00.000+08:00

1) I desperately need a new Sling Bag which can put my laptop and all my craps inside..

2)I need a new pair of pants/jeans/3 quarters.. Etc..

3)I need a new shirt too..

4)I wan to watch The OMEN & Superman..

5)Dun wan to be alone/bored/sianz/psycho..

6)Pass 'O' LvL Maths..

7)Pass Poly Year2..

There's so many freaking things i must do.. Sianz.. As for number 5, my classmates will sure comment alot on tat de.. But as much as i dun wan to be bored/alone/sianz/pshcho, i can't help it.. I so seriously need to pass my O LvLs maths la.. If not i'll be so so so very dead.. I oso need a sling bag too.. Arghh!!.. Tat someone said wan pei me go shopping de dun wan go le.. =.= Bluff me..
Believe it anot, today i was forced to eat CUP NOODLES at home.. ZzZ.. Dunno y this few days so moody.. Maybe its tat time of the month.. Haiyo.. Nvm, i believe tat tomolo will be a better day.. Really hope i can go sch everyday wif tis kind of enthusiasm... Thanks Priscilla for being there when i needed someone to tok to.. =D
Jus to let u noe tat ur a great great great fren.. =)

2006-06-21T11:25:00.001+08:00

Your Love Life Secrets Are

Looking back on your life, you will only have one true love.

You're a little scarred from your past relationships, but who isn't?

You prefer a quirky, unique person to be your lover. You're easy going about who you're with, as long as they love you back.

In fights, you are able to walk away and calm down. You are able to weather the storm.

You have a hard time ending relationships, even if the other person says it's over.

Your Love Life Secrets, Revealed

2006-06-20T14:29:00.000+08:00

Don't you feel that dreams are beautiful because things always go your way.. because people who are furthest from you can be by right by your side.. and all the impossible become possible! I've really wished to live forever in my dreams and never wake up.. In my dreams i could fulfill wad i can never fufill in reality.. Although i rarely have any dreams, but when i do, i try to make myself remember the sweet moments in my dreams and let it forever be in my heart.. Whenever i wake up abruptly frm my dreams, i will always try to force myself to go back to slp and try to re-dream my dreams.. Hopefully everynight i goes to slp, i'll dream till my hearts content and not wake up.. Plz... =X

people who have everything wun have love
people who have love wun have everything
people say that love is everything
others say that love is nth compared to everything
the world is contridicting .. at least i think so..

2006-06-19T14:31:00.000+08:00

There is an emptiness is all of us.. Whether we are old or young, whether we have close friends or if we have a spouse.. This is because only God can fill this space.. So I believe, we will only be complete when we die and go to heaven.. People enter our lives, but did God send them to fill the space partially, or are they just a distraction?

Sometimes you might think that a person is God-sent to fill the space, but in actual fact, they may just be distractions.. Take for example, a breakup.. Then ask youself.. Was it worth loving the person in the first place? The answer: Of course.. We must learn to love unconditionally.. That is to love and not expect ANYTHING in return..

Talking about love, unlike what the protestants say.. We believe that God judge people by LOVE, not by religion.. On judgement day, he separates us into 2 categories - those that love, and those that do not love. Have you ever walked on the street where some protestant harrass you and say you can only enter heaven if you are a christian? I don't buy their story..

Talking about christians, i feel tat you do not show ur faith by bragging, but by doin good..

2006-06-18T18:44:00.000+08:00

Jus came back from Singapore Street Fest.. And it totally sux.. I hated it alot.. ArgHHH!!! Actually staying till 7pm de, but decided to come back early to slp.. Same freaking problem wif me sia.. Whole body aching.. ZzZ.. Lets see, there are little crowd there and i cant perform well due to lack of response from the freaking audience!! ZzZ.. But someone really made my day today, he was a casual fren of mine, he came up to me and asked me "have u slimmed down?", tis question alone made me happy sia.. Haha.. Although today i ate macdonals chicken fantastic meal, i felt so damn full le.. Cool sia.. Gonna stay in shape.. Haha..

Now im so totally bored.. Dunno wad to do lehz.. Arms are aching.. Strained both my arms musscles.. And same old usual backache.. ZzZ.. When will all these go away?! Seriously Bored la!!!!! ARGHHHH!!!! Ntg to do!!!! Im so stonned.. Haiz....
I've been thinking, In tis world, there are ppl who are out to make u unhappy and there are ppl who are upset because you are unhappy.. I wan to be the 2nd type of person.. But i have inadvertenly made u upset.. Im such a fool.. Really so stupid.. Haiz..

2006-06-18T11:13:00.000+08:00

Alright.. I've successfully maintained my weight at 80kg.. Haha.. Tis morning weight was abt 79.8kg.. Was so freaking happy la.. Didnt noe tat i could see the number 7 in my weight again.. Haha.. I tot forever its gonna start wif the number 8.. =X

Yesterday was walking home after bball game.. Was listening to music on my hp mp3 player.. And was blasting it.. As i was crossing the road, i walked a few steps aways from the pavement, suddenly a lorry jus sounded its horn and it was lik too late for me to react.. All i did was jus turn and take one step back, coz its jus too sudden.. When i turn, my bag actaully hit the side of the lorry.. Imagine if i was slow by a sec.. Cool eh?.. Haha.. At tat moment it was due to natural reaction to move back.. But if given another chance ah, maybe i would rather get hit by it and hope for the best.. Haha.. I can understand wad it means by when a person is close to death, the person will have lots of flashbacks.. But wad the heck lo.. Ppl lik me should be gone la.. If not i'll jus add on to others and my own misery.. Haha.. Dun wan to write le.. Whole body aching..

2006-06-17T13:41:00.000+08:00

You Have Low Self Esteem 64% of the Time

You tend to blame yourself when things go wrong, regardless of whether it's your fault or not.You're anxious to please others and rely too much on their opinions. Learn to please yourself first, and your confidence will soar.

How is Your Self Esteem?

How You Are In Love

You fall in love quickly and easily. And very often.
You give and take equally in relationships.
You tend to get very attached when you're with someone. You want to see your love all the time.
You love your partner unconditionally and don't try to make them change.
You stay in love for a long time, even if you aren't loved back. When you fall, you fall hard.

How Are You In Love?

How You Life Your Life

You seem to be straight forward, but you keep a lot inside.You're laid back and chill, but sometimes you care too much about what others think.You tend to have one best friend you hang with, as opposed to many aquaintences.You tend to dream big, but you worry that your dreams aren't attainable.

How Do You Live Your Life?

Your Birthdate: December 14

You work well with others. That is, you're good at getting them to do work for you.It's true that you get by on your charm. But so what? You make people happy!You're dynamic, clever, and funny. And people like to have you around.But you're so restless, they better not expect you to stay around for long.
Your strength: Your superstar charisma
Your weakness: Commitment means nothing to you
Your power color: Fuchsia
Your power symbol: Diamond
Your power month: May

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

2006-06-17T13:35:00.000+08:00

In the middle of the night I heard myself shout,
It was my heart coz my mouth was shut.
My heart bled when u told me "I'm sorry",
That we were incompatible just that I wasn't wary.
I had to agree to end this feeling,
But my heart protested by all its bleeding.
I need your love to keep me breathing,
Without your love I dun feel like a living
I want to know why, u wanted to leave so abruptly,
Decided to follow up behind ur steps secretly..
There I saw you giving your heart away,
And crushed my heart along the way.
As time passes, the heart is healed..
But scars remain hard to conceal.
Kisses n hugs can only be reviewed,
By the memories that's left so few..

2006-06-17T11:49:00.000+08:00

Why am i here on tis earth to make ppl's and my life miserable?! Wouldnt i be better off dead? Y am i so stupid? Why? Being honest is not always good.. If u were me, being honest and hurt someone u care, will u still be honest? Y was i honest when i could jus dismiss it as someone's past?! Im really really sorry.. But jus saying sorry makes me feel so useless.. I feel so useless by keep on saying sorry and not being able to console the person.. I hate hurting ppl! Y wasn't i more understanding?! WHY?! Im always a failure in such things.. Frenz dun hurt each other.. I dun even have the rights to be called ur fren.. Im so freaking DUMB! Tis is one of the greatest mistake that i have ever done in the 19years of my fucking life! I seriously dun wish to live this miserable life any longer.. Every day my heart is bleeding, every hour is piercing, every min is filled wif sadist thinkings and every seconds is pure torture.. Im really sorry for hurting u.. Im a good example of an IDIOT.. Jus kill me if u feel lik to.. I would thank u for putting me off all my misery..

2006-06-16T17:38:00.000+08:00

Finally i had something to blog abt.. Jus woke up and was thinking tat i had a really really scary(or rather kind of bad) dream.. But it was not a dream.. Its true.. Forget abt wad i've jus written.. For those of u who had not seen me performing magic up close and personal, this sunday 18 june is the time for u guys to catch me in action.. I'll be at The Atrium @ Orchard(Dohby Ghaut Mrt) from 1pm all the way entertaining crowds till 7pm.. If u have the time jus come down and enjoy the show.. Its my first ever Singapore Street Festival performance and im goin to gib it all my best.. Other then this performance, i hav National Day Fringe activities coming up, the NDP fringe activites is a platform for youths in Singapore to showcase their talents and to entertain the crowds coming in to the stadium during the NDP and the NDP preview.. I'll be situated at the West enterance and entertaining crowds of up to 100k people.. Its jus an honor being able to be engaged by organisers to help them out.. Oh ya, i hab 2 NDP Preview tix to sell.. Anyone interested can find me..

I think tis nightmare is really starting to wear me out.. Arghhh!!!!

2006-06-11T15:10:00.000+08:00

Wow.. Its been the 2 day i went running in the rain.. Yesterday night was feeling abit down and i tot wad the heck.. Since its still early, so i alight 10 bus stops away frm my house and ran all the way back in the rain.. Somemore i was carrying my bag which was abt 4kg sia.. HAHA.. Feel kinda proud tat i can make it home.. Ran for abt 3-4km.. O.o Best thing is tat i have not eaten anything since 12pm in the afternoon.. I ran at abt 9pm if im not wrong.. Went home bath and slept.. Haha.. Den tis afternoon woke up and it was raining very heavily.. So i went runing again.. BUT tis time its different sia.. The rain was so so so DAMN heavy!! The wind is so damn cold! I started running for abt 500m and the wind was lik so freaking freezing la.. So i slowly jogged back home.. But the feeling of jogging in the rain was so good.. It feels lik all the troubles are gone for that particular moment.. Everything is so beautiful.. The feeling is lik high on estacy.. I cant believe tat i can take it sia.. I oso jus realised tat i haven not eaten since yesterday 12pm.. Seriously ntg.. Only water.. Even now im bloggin i still have not eaten.. My weight have gone down by 4.5ks sia.. So good.. But i noe its not good to run in rain.. But ah, its jus so addictive la.. Its lik wad cigarettes is to smokers.. Wad KFC is to chicken.. Haha.. Lets see later if my mom will buy food back anot.. Coz i seriously dun wan to go down buy food.. Running in the rain is good u see, coz when ur crying and running in the rain, no one will notice it.. I really love the rain alot.. Coz i can be myself in the rain.. Ntg to hide.. Stopping here le.. Got to make a hot drink.. =.=

2006-06-09T00:24:00.000+08:00

Your Love Style is Agape

You are a caring, kind, and selfless partner.
Unsurprisingly, your love style is the most rare.
You are willing to sacrfice your world for your sweetie.
Except it doesn't really feel like sacrifice to you.
For you, nothing feels better than giving to the one you love.

What's Your Love Style?

2006-06-02T21:53:00.000+08:00

Ntg much to tok abt ba i guess.. Classmates keep on disturbing me wif another gal.. ZzZ.. Damn irritating la.. So wad i was at her house? =.= Y must they rub in so much? ZzZ.. So wad if i lik a certain person or not.. Must the guys disturb us to the extent tat i very much wan to kill them? ZzZ.. Lucky the gal tat they disturb me wif is not too offended.. ZzZ.. They really overboard la.. I jus wan everything to go normally la.. ZzZ.. Im oso not very clear too.. So i would appreciate if the guys stop rubbing in.. =.= Its getting on my nerves guys..

"Liking someone is the least productive thing. It doesn't earn you any money of fill your stomach. But when you fall in love, you'll have a million of reasons to do so." - Almost Love

2006-05-26T14:42:00.000+08:00

Boring boring boring and boring!! Haiz.. Totally lose interest to study today.. Dunno y no mood to study and so sianz. Feel so bad for not contributing to my team today.. Haiz.. Today didnt tok much in class oso.. Totally lose the mood to tok.. Haiz... Fucked up sia.. So stressed la!!! I need to relax!!!! I wan someone to tok to!! The boredom is KILLING me!!!! AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! So sad... Haiz.. Sianz.. I wan to go out i wan to tok i wan to play!!!!!!! Sad~

This post is uncensored. Ratings R21

2006-05-19T22:30:00.000+08:00

(to fall in love is always easy
to start a relationship is always simple...
to build it, is always tough...
to maintain it, is 'better said than done'...
to break off, is 'easier said than done'...
to remain friends after u broke off, is never possible...
to forget the memories is 'always doing but never succeeding'...
to heal the pain within is hard and tough and never near simple...
but one has to try to heal your own heart...
the heart belongs to u...
if u don't heal it and have a space for someone to walk in,
the heart will always be sealed, memories will never be forgotten,
the pain will never go,
and u will never move on from where u started...
people take wrong directions all the time..
if not,how do we ever realise our mistakes..
and make better choices.. late it might be for your life so far,
but it is never too late for your life ahead..
maybe through wrong directions, you made the wrong choices..
but does it mean that through the right directions,
you would always make the right choices?
if everything seems like a big trial..
hold on to your faith..
for at least,you had a chance to live a choice)

What am i doin wif my life sia?! Totally no direction.. Haiz.. Watched a funny movie on my lappy jus now.. There's a part in "Army Daze" which talks about live in army.. One part says tat during army gatherings for bbq or etc, the guys will bring their girlfriends along.. And those who doesn't have any galfren will beg their cousins, sisters, long lost cousin and others.. I noe its quite lame for me to think about it seriously la.. But there is also some truth in it.. Im really afraid tat im single all the way throughout my life.. Sianz.. Arghhh!! Nvm me.. Im nuts!..

Im thinking of the same things i tot about all the time.. Thinking of y m i such a loser.. Cant even have someone to care for, to pamper and to love.. Haiz.. Im thinking something lik y tat guy can be so happy wif my ex and here i m being all alone.. I find it very very very UNFAIR! Pardon me but im not thinking normally now.. Im feeling very fucked up and depressed.. Probably the guy wont even understand wad is depressed.. He is enjoying life wif her now.. haiz.. Fucking life! So wad if Singapore is a democratic country??! ITS FUCKING UNFAIR LA!! 3 words to end tis post.. JUS FUCK IT!

2006-05-18T12:31:00.000+08:00

LoLxX.. Notice that the wizard is different? I edited the talking wizard.. Haha.. And now its time to add new post to my blog.. I noe its a near to death blog.. Haha.. But at least the tag box is still active.. =D
School is as per normal.. Haha.. Feeling kinda crappy all the time.. LoLxX.. Im always a crappy person.. Lets see, tis post is goin to be lots of pictures taken using my HP.. Haha..

My first circuit board which earned my an 'A' grade for the day.. Haha.. Looks kinda cartoon dun u think?.. =X

My second circuit.. Tis is a half adder circuit.. Stupid electronics thingy.. zzz.. So troublesome.. If u have notice, the hand in the picture is not mine.. Its Jasmine hands.. =.= Her hand is too despo to take photos.. =X

Tis photo is taken during my sch SLA open house.. A showcase of all the interest groups in my sch.. The photo again wif the fingers is not mine.. Tis time its Pris hands.. =.=

What you are seeing in tis photo is not a edited picture nor issit a illusion.. Tis paper is really levitating in between my hands.. I was jus practising around.. Haha..

Tis is Hui Lian in KTV.. Notice the way she sits and sing.. Haha.. Looks damn funny la.. HAHA.. All of us laughed when she sat down lik tis and sing.. HAHA..

Tis is Benjamin.. Haha.. The gal on the top left is Jasmine.. Jasmine is the gal which i said earlier on that her hands is despo to take photos.. =X

Another picture.. Hui Lian and Jasmine.. Instead of sitting down on the chair to sing they sat on top of the sofa.. =.= Jasmine said standing up den can sing better.. =.=

After KTV still went to Ice Skate.. haha.. Fun sia.. Some random pictures of the rink.. Kel wanted to update his friendster so he asked me to take a photo of him.. HAHAHAHAHAHA....

2006-05-04T15:24:00.000+08:00

Tuesday my front lower tooth chipped off.. Why did it chipped off? Because of a stupid Burger King breakfast burger.. ZzZ.. After eating the burger, i felt that half of my tooth was gone.. =.=
Went to see dentist on wednesday.. Wad the dentist do is jus use the drill to flatten the jagged edges of my chipped off tooth.. ZzZ.. And the dentist found a hole in my molar tooth and he patched it up.. The whole cost of the visit was $50.. =.= Damn expensive sia!! Kaoz..

And i got my new N3250 on Saturday.. So power la the phone.. The stupid sales gal disturb me.. =.= I said i wanted a black N3250..

Sales gal: ok.. pink ah..
Me: NOOOO!!!! I wan black..
Sales gal: okok.. confirm pink ah?
Me: NOOO!!!!!! =.= Black la..

She is the lamest sales gal i ever met.. =.= But quite fun la.. Haha.. I always disturb ppl, now i kanna disturbed.. LOLxX..

Picture from www.nokia.com.sg

2006-04-25T18:26:00.000+08:00

These few days.. Or rather, these few weeks, i sometimes get tis strange feeling.. The feeling of loneliness.. Seeing others so happy together.. Jus tat alone makes me feel jealous.. It makes me start to think that y dun i hav someone to be wif? Why dun i have someone special to pamper, care, love and cry wif? I've neber ever in my life pamper a person b4.. I really wished to be able to have someone to care for.. Haiz.. Y issit so hard? All these seems so impossible.. All i can do is to love in VAIN.. How much sadness to i hav to endure? How much pain do i hav to go thru? I really yearn to have a person to pamper and to give small little suprises to.. I've never truly felt love b4.. The best i had was only heartaches.. Y do all these thoughts haunt me?

Of all the pains, the Greatest pain is to Love, But to Love In Vain.. I carry a smile, But my Heart is Broken into Pieces.. ='(

2006-04-23T21:36:00.000+08:00

Tis post was taken from my frens Priscilla blog.. Bcoz i dunno how to post chinese words on my blog, so i post the screeshot here.. Tis is the same as how i feel.. Haiz.. Kinda lazy to post.. Tis few days very depressed.. Haiz.. Dunno la.. Im lik a living dead now.. ='(

2006-04-10T13:46:00.000+08:00

Ok la.. Seems lik i have to update my tis near-to-death blog.. Haha.. Lets see.. My sch magic club was invited to Home Club(a pub) on 31 march.. We pratically had loads of fun and also drank quite alot coz there was a free flow of drinks at 11pm.. I had a vodka lemon and whisky dry.. And some other drinks which i cant remember.. =X i dunno y im jus attracted to alchol.. Maybe it can stop me frm thinking? Haiz.. Had fun wif my frenz at the pub.. Here r the photos taken frm my frenz blog.. She did body painting in the pub tat day..

Me, Pris and Julie...

I look lik im dead already.. zzz..

The Magic IG Peeps.. haha..

The Table..

(5th April)

Jolynn helped me to revise my maths.. But as usual, i kinda gave up doing the Paper 2 tat she asked me to do.. So at abt 5pm we went out to parkway to eat Sakura-Suki Sushi.. The food there is superb.. We reached tat abt 6.30pm and there were still alot of tables left.. Weekdays have much lesser ppl.. Haha.. We ate alot sia.. Or rather I eat alot.. Haha.. We started wif sharkfin soup.. zzz.. she asked to take soup for her.. Den i put vinegar coz shark fins always goes wif vinegar ma.. Den she told me tat she didnt wan the soup wif vinegar.. ZZZ.. So i no choice but to drink both bowl of soup!! ZzZ.. While eating halfway.. I tot of drinking some wine or beer.. Or rather Sake.. Coz i've neber tasted Sake b4.. So.. Jolynn ordered 1 hot Sake.. And when it came, i was lik WTH?! The thing is so small.. u noe lik those China tea cup? den the bottle of wine is lik 1/6 of ur average Vodka bottle.. And it cost $6.50.. ZzZ.. The price is ok la.. But the Sake i dun lik.. The taste is very strong.. It was lik after drinking it, the next sec, the smell of the Sake comes out frm ur nose.. Tat is how strong it is.. LoLxX.. But it was worth the try.. not bad.. haha..

(7th March)

Went BBQing wif my usual sec sch gang.. Had fun too.. Haha.. Den saw her.. She still the same.. Looks lik ntg have changed.. But in fact for me everythings had changed.. She is the one tat i lik but i can no longer like her.. Haiz.. Coz she is attached.. How cruel is life?! Den yesterday night, i dreamt of something tat made me cry in the middle of the night.. Yes.. Its abt her.. But i wont blog down the details.. Haiz.. Everything sux man..

If i knew

2006-03-19T19:07:00.000+08:00

Haiz.. If i knew things earlier, it would save me lots of heartaches.. If i knew things earlier, it would be easier for me to let go.. If only i knew.......

If only i knew that she had someone she love deeply earlier, at that point of time i would already let go.. But i only knew things when its already happened.. No chance for me to take cover.. No chance for me to accept the truth.. That is my my heart now is bleeding profusely.. Non-stop bleeding..

Love is a double edge sword.. It can put a person on cloud 9 and i could also drive a person to the edge...

I feel that love is really unfair.. Ntg is fair in this fucking world.. I did not even have a decent relationship even till now.. Not even 1 fucking real relationship.. ZzZ.. Stupid...

2006-03-10T18:25:00.000+08:00

Actually today had ntg to blog about.. But so coincidentally i saw her.. But not only her alone.. But wif her stead.. It was abt 3.05pm and I was on the train approaching Yishun mrt as i was meeting Long, Teck and Yg to go to Bishan.. When the train was reaching the Yishun station, i as usual would look out of the train.. But jus nice i saw them walking hand in hand toward Yishun bus interchange.. I dun think i saw wrongly because my eyes neber betrayed me b4.. She was wearing a purplish pink top and dark brown 3 quarter.. The guy was wearing a white shirt.. Its jus such a coincidence.. Long and Teck couldn't confirm if that i her.. But i guarantee that it was her.. Haha.. The world is really so small.. zZz....

2006-03-09T12:59:00.000+08:00

Before chalet abt 2.30pm
Jus 1/2 hr after we checked in the chalet, Jack Daniel's was already empty.. I drank abt 1/3 of the bottle while the rest were shared among 2 of my frens who were there.. There were only 4 of us when we checked in.. 3 guys 1 gal.. Right after tis photo was taken, my fren went to open the Jim Bean bottle.. This Jim Bean was really too rough for me.. I tried to drink one mouthful of it, and ended up wif bloodshot eyes and flushes.. It was too strong for me to drink it raw.. But the 2 guy frenz of mine was damn power.. They drank almost half of it raw!!! I had to mix it wif coke the following rounds.. We 3 guys started playing BlackJack and the punishment was to drink the Jim Bean raw.. I won the first few rounds den suddenly both of my frenz kept on blackjack.. I had to drink almost one party cup of Jim Bean!!! That was when i told them to stop playing.. I couldn't drink it raw anymore.. After the game, while waiting for the rest of my frenz to come chalet, i slept alittle while.. When i woke up, i had a terrible fucking headache which until now is still pain..

I tot tat was all the liquior we got for the whole day.. But no... My fren who was a very good guy brought 2 red wine and 1 white wine soon after the BBQ started.. And after the BBQ, we when up to the chalet and played indian poker.. That was when i drank 2 full cups of champange... And now i noe that chanpange can get u high alot faster then hard liquior.. Soon i was almost knocked out after few more drinks.. But when we played till the wines and champange finished, my fren Nick when to 7-11 to buy 3 more white wines!!! So we played till 2 bottles of wines were left, only then we stopped.. After that we were chatting and toking aboutghost stories and etc..

Up till now my head is still very pain.. Arghhh.. But today is oso the day i swore to forget everything damn thing that i dun wan to remember.. Lets cheers to a new beginning!!

Tis was a stupid picture taken by my fren when i was drinking.. =.=

2006-03-08T00:28:00.000+08:00

Lets see.. Tomolo is my class chalet day.. Hope nick brought lots of liquor.. =)
Something tat shocked me today was tat someone told me tat the guy's age was younger den 'her'.. That's something really shockingly freaky..

I personally, starting from now onwards, do not believe in TRUE LOVE.. I do not believe that there is tat special someone for everyone.. Because if everyone have a special someone, there wont be loneliness in this fucking world anymore..

Human psychology is such a difficult topic.. Y one person needs another person? I believe that everyone is making use of each other only.. There is never true love.. Y issit tat love was wad it meant in the beginning but hate was wad it was in the end? If there was true love in the first place, y would people get annoyed wif each other easily in the course of the relationship? Y issit always one trying to change the other and when one fails to change, they fail to love, they fail to accept? Fuck tis stupid fucking world la..

Tis is a stupid and useless entry.. Maybe im jus too fucked up..

2006-03-06T21:23:00.000+08:00

Haiz.. I've found out the truth le.. Thanks to my 'frenz~' whom only today told me abt it.. After much persuasion from me.. Yes.. U've guessed it.. The one i loved has found her loved one.. And yes i hate the feeling.. Why? Because it happened to me 2 FUCKING TIMES!!! TWICE!!! First time was my church fren.. Den i swore that tis will neber happen to me ever again! Now... IT FUCKING HAPPENED AGAIN!!! Thanks la.. For letting me be the last to noe everything... Fucking hell.. Its lik living in the past whereby all the old memories kept on haunting me!! Y is my fucking love life in such a fucking mess?! Cant it be as simple as i tot it would?! "You will meet someone else better" says my frenz.. But fuck it la.. Meet someone better but only to find out tat that person was never interested in you and had left u quietly.. FUCK IT LA!!

Imagine ppl telling u tis.. "Eh.. wanna go out anot? 'X , Y and Z' is bringing his gf and 'Y' is bringing her steady lehz.. Wanna go out anot? My gf not goin.. But i still go out wif u all.."(not saying anyone.. jus an example..)
Tell me how should i feel? Hate it so much la.. FUCK!

Den chalet.. From last time it was 3 days 2 nights den slowly now it changes to 2 days 1 night.. Jus because it was boring to have 3 days.. Boring?! Den might as well not have anything at all!! I can predict that for the next gathering, we wont even bother to book chalet.. We will be at who noes sembawang park BBQ-ing.. Den the following gatherings will be lik " hey.. tis sat wanna ask everyone gather anot?" den someone will reply " dun wan la.. no need de la.. meet le oso ntg to do.. so boring de.."

Tis is how i predict our clique would end up.. Jus wait and see...

2006-03-01T07:15:00.000+08:00

There are things in life we cannot take for granted; falling in love, falling out of love, hoping to be in love and wanting to be loved. No matter what, love is all about to be loved, to love and loving.

May it be puppy love, true love, infatuation, crushes, real love and teenage love... These fall in different category. The world is subjective and the word 'Love' has become rather haphazard... The word 'Love' spreads in different ways... When we look at an elderly couple holding hands & kissing each others' cheeks, we call that 'Real Love'. When we look at a girl checking out on a guy, we call that infatuation. When we look at teenagers kissing on the bus, we call it 'Puppy Love'... How do you define each scenario? I may sound very amateurish, inexperienced & childish... Why? Maybe because I lacked the true meaning of being loved, loving and to love... My real ex-boyfriend was rather due to lack of communication, no holding hands, no first kiss & no 'heavy petting'... Therefore, I am deprived of the to love, to be loved and loving...

Even if you love someone but he/she doesn't know how much you love them, it doesn't mean it has to be a waste of time... Even if you love someone and you do not know how long the feeling will last, it doesn't mean you have to let it go... Even if you love someone yet the feeling is too strong for you to focus on anything else, it doesn't mean you are putting all your time on her/him till the point you lose control of your emotions... Even if you love someone but someone else doubt your love for him/her, it doesn't necessarily means for you to quit... All these narrow down to mind over body... Other people's judgement on love isn't the same as your judgement on love. Other people's judgement on you ain't gonna change if you want them to change you. It's all about your confidence and your strength.

"There are army of lovers who are dying to meet you and dying to make your acquintance... It could be you, it could be me... So don't let go, cos I need you so..." -Lee Ryan's 'Army of Lovers'.

Whatever love means, it is how you define love in your own way... It is how you look at love... Love is an interesting thing in the world... It just makes you float like butterflies, give you butterflies in your stomach and see butterflies on a sunny day... Love is just a beautiful thing... Define love yourself... And don't let others bring you down with what they say about love and its cons... Be strong in love, and don't let your emotions & instinct pull you down... Trust yourself first before letting others trust you! Love is all about taking self-control... YOU who makes the world go round.... Embrace love no matter how short-lived or at a long-term it runs... Love it!

2006-02-24T09:46:00.000+08:00

You Are 56% Evil

You are evil, but you haven't yet mastered the dark side.
Fear not though - you are on your way to world domination.

How Evil Are You?

2006-02-19T23:18:00.000+08:00

Haiz.. Been thinking alot these few days.. Haiz.. Had been feeling very bad.. Haiz.. Yesterday worked at forum the sales was very good sia.. Im so pleased wif myself.. Managed to sell abt 20++ items.. Add together abt more than $250.. Haha..

Haiz.. Have to work harder for my grades le.. Sad.. Haiz.. March holidays got chalet.. Wonder wad will i feel when i see her again.. I noe that we can neber be together but a small little part of me wish tat if she ever changes her mind, i'll still have a chance.. But i noe im jus dreaming.. Haiz

The further distance in this world is not Life and Death,
but its im standing right infront of u but u dun noe I Love You..

2006-02-14T09:28:00.001+08:00

Fuck! I hate tis day!!!!! FUCK IT!!! Na Bei... Haiz.. Should have jus stayed home today.. Y did i come out today?! Why?!! Shit Man! Haiz.. The feeling is so bad la.. Haiz.. I hate tis feeling la! Hiaz.. Wanna feel lik going out alone.. But dunno where to go alone.. Everywhere is all couples.. Haiz.. See liao even worse! =.= I noe tat i cannot be wif her but i jus cant help missing her.. Haiz.. Its jus so worng.. But i cant help it! Frens all have steadys to go out today.. Feel so lonely.. Haiz.. Y must it be tis way?

Cradle of Filth - Nymphetamine

Cold was my soul and untold was the pain I faced when you left me; a rose in the rain.

2006-02-10T14:58:00.000+08:00

I got freaking E8 for my Elementary Mathematics!! Fuck.. Now dunno how to face my father.. Haiz.. Die la.. Now no mood le.. Sad.. ZzZ... Must retake tis year again.. Haiz.. So fucked up!!!

2006-02-09T14:53:00.000+08:00

Haiz.. Im finally back blogging.. Tomolo is the day O level results is release.. I so freaking pissed and stressed out.. Coz i know that i'll fail for sure.. Haiz.. I feel so fucked up now.. Y? I do not know too.. Haiz.. Yesterday went wif Pris, Mat and Dr Loke to get magic stuffs for our upcoming show at the zoo for RP facillitators family day.. It was fun.. Finally im gonna get the $55 card clip.. And the sch is funding it.. Tat means tat i do not need to fork out a single cent.. We got lots of fun stuffs lik the dancing hanky, Big Floating Ball and a few decks.. All adds up to a total of abt $240.. And we still have lots more funds to use.. =)

Nowadays, i still miss her alot.. Dunno y la.. I dun wish to elaborate on it.. Jus miss her alot.. Haiz.. Tomolo is my Doom's day.. Goodbye cruel world~

2006-01-26T10:15:00.000+08:00

Haiz.. Its been so long since i've blogged.. Past few days really very very busy.. Yesterday skipped lesson to go play pool.. Haha.. After tat went to watch Geisha.. The show damn nice la.. Especially the little Chiyo.. She is so cute la.. Haha.. The show overall i give it 4/5 stars.. Haha.. The actors oso very nice..

During the open house was one of my best experience.. I finally performed for a crowd of ppl.. Haha.. I wan get the photos and post it here.. LOLXx..

2006-01-13T14:11:00.000+08:00

Haiz.. Its been some time since i post new post already.. These few days really busy, lethargic and moody.. Been thinking alot la.. Haiz.. Yesterday noticed that she changed her msn nick le.. Somehow i feel tat she wanted to move on and forget abt wad has happened.. Wad i feel is tat she wanted to forget abt me and those sad things that happened for the past year.. Its good tat she is moving on already.. But her nick also says tat she did not wan to think abt the future and she wanted to concentrate on the present.. I feel tat she didnt wan to think abt everything.. I dunno how to explain.. But somehow i feel very sad when i saw her nick la.. Haiz.. I keep on trying to move on but i always feel stucked in the same spot.. It seems lik i wont be able to move on le.. Lik i said in the previous post, i feel that something is missing in my life and i cant move on.. Haiz..

Tomolo is my Sch Open House.. Will be busy for these 4 days.. At least i'll keep myself busy for these 4 days.. Haiz.. Really cant stop thinking abt her.. Haiz..

2006-01-10T00:07:00.000+08:00

Haiz.. Today morning was kinda disappointed.. Coz i tried toking to her in msn.. But she replied me coldly.. Althought i was paranoid, i was quite sad in the whole morning.. Den when at night, i tried toking to her again.. This time was better.. Made me feel very relieved.. Haiz.. I changed my blog song again.. I think this song relates to me very well.. I really loved her alot.. Up to the point where by I cant continue living normally without her.. She came into my life and changed my living cycle.. Now she leaving, i can return back to normal anymore.. I need her to continue.. But i guess its useless now.. She'll neber be mine again.. But.. I believe there is still hope.. No matter how small my chances are, i wont gib up.. Today was quite boring.. Haiz.. Think of her every now and then.. Haiz..

2006-01-09T01:00:00.000+08:00

Haiz.. Some frenz told me to gib up.. But some told me to press on and dun gib up.. My fren told me to act normal towards her.. Be her fren.. Chat wif her.. Show her that she really means so much to me.. I really wanna chat wif her lik how we used to chat.. But I dunno if its ever possible to chat the same way we did b4 anot.. Haiz.. I guess since i dun wanna gib up, i'll jus continue to show her that i really am serious and she really mean tat much to me.. I wont gib up.. My fren say i ONLY waited 1 year.. Still not considered long.. If i dun try i'll neber noe.. She says that the future no one can predict wan.. So i'll jus try my best.. She means the world to me.. Really....

2006-01-08T22:42:00.000+08:00

Haiz.. Its been 2 days that i'm MIA from the net.. Yesterday and today i was busy training wif my seniors in Toys 'R' Us.. Can say tat these 2 days i've been trying to enjoy myself to the max.. But i only succeded halfway.. Coz i'll still be missing her most of the time.. Haiz.. Really miss her la.. Everytime wanna chat wif her but dun dare.. Haiz.. Im so stupid to ask her la.. If i didnt ask, ntg will change now.. Haiz.. Now everythings have changed.. I dun even noe how to be frens wif her.. Its lik starting all over again.. Its jus so hard.. Haiz.. How to be close frenz? I wonder when will be the day tat i could jokingly ask her "hey.. still dun have a steady yet? haha.."
Really dunno when will i be able to say tat.. Right now i really cant get over her.. I really dunno when i could give up.. Maybe i'll neber gib up.. Who knows.. Haiz.. Now i jus wanna polish up my magic presentation skills in order to earn more commission.. Haiz.. Really Missing her alot.. Never wanna lose her..

2006-01-06T14:48:00.000+08:00

Haiz.. How i wish to have an ipod.. I've entered a contest in my sch.. Abt CPF wan.. ZzZ.. Lame.. Only top 100th players can get in the finals.. Haha.. Im in the top 50.. Cool.. Here's a link to the game for those interested.. CPF Monopoly.. Sianz.. Life Sux la.. Jus changed blog song.. By S.H.E.. The lyrics of tis song reflects my feelings now.. So cool lo.. Haiz.. Issit the end of the world? Really dunno wad to do la.. Wad m i left wif now? To me now everything is lost.. I regret my decision everyday.. Whenever im on the bus, i'll think of her.. Coz on the bus, i have lots of free time.. Everytime i think of tat day, i'll jus laugh at myself for being so stupid.. Haiz.. Im trying to come to terms wif wad has happened.. But it seems impossible.. Haiz.. I'll jus end today's post wif a quote..

"Love can sometimes be very magical but magic can sometimes be simply an illusion."

2006-01-04T18:44:00.000+08:00

You are BONE-BREAKING.
Synopsis: This behavior is obviously the most severe of them all. Not much is known about this, as it is very rare, but it sometimes comes as a result of a person hitting themselves or another object. The emotions are similar, with the person becoming increasingly more angry over a period of time instead of self-harming immediately. One major difference, however, is that the person has very little self-worth.

Positive trait: Willing to try anything once
Negative trait: Low self-worth
Color: Grey
Emotion: Uncaring
Animal: Monkey
Quote: Cold was my soul and untold was the pain I faced when you left me; a rose in the rain.

408 other people got this result!
This quiz has been taken 11621 times.
4% of people had this result.

Freaking test.. It say im the worst of all the form of self-mutilation.. ZzZ.. But maybe its true.. 0.o

2006-01-03T13:35:00.000+08:00

I dun need to wait till night.. I noe the answer now.. She msg me saying even if tok at night the answer will still be the same.. Haiz.. I dun wan to force her le.. But i jus find it very unfair.. Haiz.. So freaking sad lo.. Haiz.. But i'll always be there for her.. But i dun think if she got any problems she oso wont tell me de.. So no point saying it oso.. If she could understand me it'll be good.. But i think she'll never ever understand me.. ='(

She say its better to be close frenz.. But there are alot of things close friends cant do.. I wan to care for her.. Knows wads happening in her life.. Be there for her etc.. I wan to help her when her leg is pain, i want to be there when she's sick.. There are millions of things that i cant do for her.. So wad if im her close/best fren? It doesnt make any difference to the situation.. It only simply upgrade my status as her FREN to CLOSE FREN.. But there is no difference.. I do not know her daily happenings.. Not even weekly.. Its lik so distant.. I dunno when we'll meet.. But when we meet im afraid i'll miss her alot.. Haiz.. Cruel..

2006-01-03T07:03:00.000+08:00

Y does she have to be so firm on her decision??! Y must she snuff all hopes in me?? Cant she gib me a chance to prove tat wad i said can be done? I dun believe that once the feelings is gone that will be the end of an relationship.. Today there is still a chance for me to persuade her.. But i dun think its gonna be useful at all.. She is so firm on her answer.. It really starts to freak me out.. She is so relentless.. Y cant she listen to me for once? Let us try out.. Probably for few months.. That will be the last resort.. I really dun wish to give up without trying.. She says tat her answer will forever be the same.. Y?? 1 Year had passed.. And she still gives me the same answer... Its a matter of trying or not.. I really dun understand y she couldnt jus try for the last time.. Perhaps she could tell me wads wrong and we try to fix the problem instead of avoiding it.. The problem between us now is the barrier of her feelings towards me.. If we passed tat barrier, i guess there will be ntg between us already.. I really dunno how to persuade her.. But i'll put in ALL that i've got today.. No matter wad.. I wont gib up.. It not in my blood to be a quitter..

2006-01-02T12:16:00.000+08:00

Haha.. Jus as i predicted.. Im always so accurate.. I guess the 2nd rejection is coming soon.. Lets see.. Yesterday night i sms her (dun ask me y i didnt call instead sms, im a weakling k..) to ask her if she could be mine.. So i wrote a 5 sms long msg to her.. Hoping that i'll get a reply.. So i waited and waited.. Every min passes, it seems tat my hopes are getting lesser.. Soon it was past 3hours, i sent her another msg askin her y didnt she reply, issit becoz she needed more time or issit bcoz she wanted to reject me but didnt noe how to put it across?.. After awhile, soon to midnight, i gave up hope tat she will reply me.. I guess tat she wanted to reject me but didnt noe how to.. Coz only when a person wanted to reject another den he/she will take so long to reply.. Deep in my heart i was hoping tat she still needs time to consider thus needing more time.. I didnt wan to think tat she wanted to reject me.. Up till now i still carry tis hope.. But it seems tat reality is cruel.. I really dun wished to have a bad start in the New Year.. But... Haiz.. I really hope she reply soon and wif a positive answer.. Haiz.. Coz my imagination is running wild wif all sorts of possibilities y she didnt reply.. Haiz.. I really regretted asking her.. Haiz.. Every sms tat i received, i open it wif fear.. Hoping tat she replied me wif a positive answer.. But everytime i open, its always my fren's msg.. Haiz..

2005-12-30T21:43:00.000+08:00

Haiz.. I really dunno weather if im able to deal wif another reject frm her.. I feel lik asking her soon.. My frenz have all told me to seize the opportunities.. If i dun seize it now, i might not have a chance in the future.. Coz she might be snatched away by others.. Haiz.. The problem now is not i dun dare to ask her.. The problem is tat if i ask her and she rejects me, i really dunno how to deal wif it.. I noe tat i wont give up.. But no matter wad.. I pray, hoped and wished that she will gib me a chance to be wif her.. I really dun ask for much.. I dun expect her to change.. I like her for the way she is.. My birthday wish is to be wif her.. Since last year till now.. I've always hoped that she will change her mind and accept me.. Give me a chance to show her how serious i m.. I really prayed hard... Hope my wish will come true and she will not disappoint me..

2005-12-30T02:48:00.000+08:00

Yeah.. Now at her house wif the rest of my frenz.. Haiz.. Kinda sad lehz.. No one chatting.. Haiz.. Now is lik so close yet so far.. Haiz.. So sad.. The feeling of distant really sux man.. Haiz.. how i wished i could tok to her more.. Really.. Haiz.. I wonder how am i gonna ask her to be my steady again.. Maybe i should seize the moment and ask her as soon as possible.. I really wished to be wif her.. I hope that she will not choose to jus run away but instead gib me and her a chance.. Haiz.. Hope she could really understand tis.. As usual, i still miss her very much.. Haiz..

Some fires are made not to be extinguished.. Such is the fire of Love..
Love is such a wonderful feeling but can really cause great hurt..
Love is a double edge sword which cuts the heart deeply..

2005-12-27T01:56:00.000+08:00

Haha.. Tonite was quite happy.. Get to tok to her and few frenz on phone.. We were conferencing.. LoLxX.. So long didnt conference and chat le.. Hmm.. They called to plan the next outing on New Year's eve.. Haha.. We had so much fun chatting.. But they all went to slp early except her.. She said the show tat she missed in the evening was repeating now and she wanted to watch it.. So no choice i could not tok to her alone.. Haha.. But nvm la.. I believe there will still be a chance to chat wif her.. =)
Thats all for tonite lo.. Nitez..

2005-12-25T21:04:00.000+08:00

Today is Christmas Day.. Merry Christmas everyone!!
Today went out wif my usual group of frens + Ha0.. We went to Pulau Ubin for a cycling trip.. I guess everyone had enjoyed themselves.. I must agree that the scenery there was fabulous! Trust me.. Its really a beauty.. Oh ya.. Sorry for bumping into u Ying.. =( It was really accidental.. Sad sia.. Her leg pain again.. Plus i still bump into her.. =.= Makes me feel very guilty.. Haha.. Makes me feel lik taking care of her forever.. LoLxX.. I hope tomolo she doesn't go swimming.. Later her leg worse.. =.=
The only happy moments today was when i get to tok to her.. Toking to her makes my life wonderful.. Thanks gal.. =) How i really wish she could take more care of her leg.. Haiz.. Hope we get to go out more often.. Den i'll have more chances of looking at her and chatting wif her.. i hope to bring our relationship closer.. Remember tat i'll still be waiting for u.. =)

Den now jus got home and checked my email.. My fren sent me a quiz.. It asked "wad is ur true colour?'' So i tot wad the heck.. And i jus did it.. And........

Blue
You're blue — the most soothing shade of the spectrum. The color of a clear summer sky or a deep, reflective ocean, blue has traditionally symbolized trust, solitude, and loyalty. Most likely a thoughtful person who values spending some time on your own, you'd rather connect deeply with a few people than have a bunch of slight acquaintances. Luckily, making close friends isn't that hard, since people are naturally attracted to you — they're soothed by your calming presence. Cool and collected, you rarely overreact. Instead, you think things through before coming to a decision. That level-headed, thoughtful approach to life is patently blue — and patently you!

2005-12-20T23:57:00.000+08:00

WHY??!! Why m i such a WIMP?!! Im chatting wif her now but i dun dare to tell her how i feel.. Why do i only noe how to express my feelings in this stupid blog?! And y dont i dare tell it to her? WhY!!!!! Haiz... There's so so so many things i wanna say out but i jus couldnt.. I really dunno y.. Haiz.. Imagine looking thru my HP calender and those memories a year ago jus came rushing into my mind.. All the things tat happened a year ago jus seems lik yesterday.. The feelings.. The heartaches... haiz.. I jus wanna let her noe how much i've been thinking of her and how much i love her.. But i jus cant seem to say it.. Haiz.. My close frens one by one, all goin to or already have a partner.. Seeing them so happy, but i jus cant help but feel sorry for myself.. Feel tat y m i such a WIMP!!! ArghH!!!.. Haiz.. All i can do now is only try to remain contact wif her.. i dun even noe her tat well compared to last year.. Haiz.. Y has distance come in between us? Haiz.. I really have so much in my mind right now.. I feel lik i cant take it anymore.. i really dunno how to act happy when im really feeling sad.. Haiz..

2005-12-17T18:36:00.000+08:00

Hmm.. Lets see.. Today.. Hmm... If she didnt break up wif me, today would already be our 12th month anniversary.. Which is also our 1 year anniversary.. But the fact is that she indeed broke up wif me.. So, today is nothing more special den a normal day.. Haiz.. But today had a really heavy downpour.. Maybe its me that moved heaven so much so that it cries for me.. Haha.. But imgine that u like a gal alot and she is single, but she would not accept u.. I believe ur feelings would be the same as me.. I believe that people will not do things that they arent confident of.. Coz i would lik to ask her for a chance.. But i totally have no confident that she will say yes.. But i everyday wake up, thinking to ask her the question and everyday i do not dare.. So given tis contridiction, im really at a lost of dunno wad to do.. Haiz.. A gal fren of mine ask me this question: "Would a guy ask a gal if she liked him?'' and "Wad would happen if he gets a negative reply, would the relationship between them becomes bad?"
I told her that a guy would ask the gal only if he really wanna know the answer and if he gets a negative reply, the relationship between them would denfinetly be affected.. Haiz.. U see.. Tat is the reason im confused and sad all the time.. Really hope there's a better way out.. Haiz..

2005-12-15T00:15:00.000+08:00

Today was my bday.. Yup.. It was very boring at first.. Becoz have to shop wif Long for his future GF gift.. ZzZ.. But after we met the gals, i was very happy!! REally Happy!!! Den Agnes said she was sick and wasnt coming to meet us, so i tot neber mind lo.. Since she's sick den nvm lo.. But she later msg CP say tat she coming and dun tell me.. ZZZ... Lame rite.. Sick den dun need come ma.. Later faint still need us bring u back.. =.= LoLxX.. Thanks Agnes for coming.. =)
Next i wan thank Ying and PL for the wonderful present.. So nice.. =D... Aft eating at Long John's, we went to PL house outside to crap and chat.. Chatting wif Ying can be quite lame oso.. Haha.. But i lik.. HAHAHA.. Really wished tat i could chat more wif her.. Tat moment while chatting wif her was the best moment today!!.. Really.. So happy.. Hope tat moment would last forever.. =(
Now i dun think i'll be giving up at all.. She'll still be the one i love the most.. Im 18 years old now.. Wad i say is very sensible.. Im not crapping.. When i say she is the one i love, I mean it!..
Good Luck for ur exams.. =)

2005-12-07T22:25:00.000+08:00

Hiaz.. It seems that all my frenz are attached one by one.. Feel very sad for myself.. Still alone.. Jus by hearing that my fren sent his potential gf home makes me think of "her".. I feel that she really wan me to give up.. Hiaz.. Maybe i should jus giv up and end this misery.. Haiz.. Its been 1 year already and i cant improve the things between us.. I guess we're really not meant to be.. I hope she will be happy always.. To see her find happiness, i'll be happy for her too...
I guess i'll be waiting until i find the right gal.. Haiz..

Time is a great healer of heartaches.. Unfortunately, my heart has broken into a million pieces that no amount of time could ever heal..

2005-11-26T22:54:00.000+08:00

Its few more days till my holidays! Im looking forward to it but think of no one to spend it wif is kinda boring.. Yesterday went to fren house to eat steamboat wif my sec sch frenz.. Actually wanted to go home at 11pm but i ended up staying her house coz i think i miss the last bus home.. Tot that it will be quite fun at her house toking through the night but, the gals went in the room to chat while i was left wif another guy fren outside the living room.. =.=
I slept from 12+ to abt 6am.. We all woke up and went home.. Haiz.. Although she is near, but tat doesn't mean that she is close.. Haiz.. My bday is next month liao.. This year, my wish will be the same as last year.. I hope it will come true.. Last year, my dream came true for a only few days.. This year, i hope that it will last forever.. Haiz.. Really hope so..
Beginning of this week, i actually muster up the courage to ask her out on Dec 23 for magic show performance at Singapore Expo.. But she ended up asking me who will be goin.. But i only wanted it to be the 2 of us goin.. Haiz.. I tot abt it awhile and told her that i haven asked the others.. Den she asked me to ask others first.. She said that if she go alone will be lik very wierd coz she tot i could only buy one ticket.. But i replied her tat if she is goin, i'll definetly be goin.. Den.... She remained silent.. I oso didnt know wad to say so i didnt reply too.. Haiz.. I dun think she would wanna go out wif me for that show.. Haiz..
I wan to spent time wif her but it seems everything is jus now right.. Haiz.. Y?!
One thing for sure.. I'll always be waiting for her..

One very wierd thing happened to me on thursday.. I was watching a chinese drama serial " 王子变青蛙" the last 2nd episode.. I suddenly cried in the bus!! Luckly i was seating at the back and there was only a few passengers.. It was a very touching scene that stired upo my feelings.. I was thinking of her while watching the show.. I didnt know y i cried but i noe its becoz of her.. =(

2005-11-19T23:24:00.000+08:00

Hiaz.. Today was supposed to be a happy day at my uncle house.. His baby boy is 1yr old.. So cute~~ But wad i saw today made me very very depressed.. Imagine being all alone.. All your cousin who are older den u by 4 - 5 years old are wif their galfren.. Haiz.. I was all alone.. I didnt know who to tok to.. I wanted to tok to someone, but there was no one i could tok to.. Haiz.. I took the lift down to the sky garden and sat down.. Thinking of her.. How good issit tat one day, i could bring her to my relatives house and spend time wif her.. Haiz.. Seeing tat all my cousin are so happy, i jus feel so lonely.. Really Lonely.. Feel lik calling her, but as usual, i didnt dare to call.. Haiz..

2005-11-09T13:51:00.000+08:00

Now in class.. Its been quite long since i update.. LoLxX.. Still missing her sia.. Heard tat time her leg pain until cannot walk sia.. Dunno how to help her.. Can only ask her see doctor.. Haiz.. Den tis friday will be O LvLs Maths paper 2.. Haiz.. Dunno this year can pass maths anot.. SO STRESSED!! Paper 1 was easy.. But i neber study.. So it seems lik the paper is not tat easy.. Sad.. Looking forward to tis SAT.. My fren bday.. Den can see until her.. Hope she's fine.. =D
I so excited tat i will be part of my school's Open House 2006!! Haha.. Magician of RP!! YaY!! =D~~~

My Magic Video for anyone who wan to watch..

2005-11-02T22:53:00.000+08:00

Sad Sad Sad agian.... Haiz.. Miss her.. But how to say? Cant say out.. Haiz.. Nov 7 is my O lvl le.. Sad.. Tis month no $$ le.. Dun feel lik goin out.. haiz.. Sad.. Friday go back sch one day den next week is O lvls le.. Hope can see her soon again.. Tis few days go find tat toopid big nose.. Jus traveling alone cost me abt 3-4 bucks!! I neber buy the concession pass for MRT tis month.. And i dun have money to top up my EZ-link card.. ZzZ.. So i have to buy the stupid standard ticket.. Haiz.. One day... I will ask her to go eat Ben & Jerry's wif me.. I must ask!!!.. Wait till Bindi birthday can see her again.. Tis time, i will sieze every opportunity to tok to her.. I will not be shy anymore!!! Haha.. ZzZ.. See how everything goes ba.. I jus wanna tok to her.. Tok & tok & tok & tok till we'r old.. Haha.. Lame..

Selamat Hari Raya~~~

2005-10-27T11:03:00.000+08:00

Wah.. So happy.. Gave her the present le!! Yay... Haha.. Hoped she liked it.. =X
Hope she enjoys her day today.. Actually wan ask her out today to eat wan.. But since she is goin out wif frens, i guess she oso wont be free for me.. LoLxX.. I dun ask for much actually.. She accepted my present liao, im more den happy le.. But there is more i wan other den only giving her present.. I wan to be wif her.. Haha.. It'll be my dream to be wif her again.. LoLxX..

Now in sch sia.. But quite fun.. Everyweek Monday and Tuesday is the most boring sia.. Haha.. Wed to Fri is the best!.. Lively.. Haha.. Next time den write more.. Not free now le.. haha.. I'll be waiting for the day to come.... =)

2005-10-21T23:46:00.000+08:00

October and November... This 2 months are the months wif the most number of birthdays.. Gonna make time to go out and celebrate wif frens.. Her birthday also falls on this month.. Still thinking of wad to buy.. Anyone have any ideas? Haha..

Today lesson in class was fun.. I read the most today than any other days of my life!.. Read up on law on infringement of Trademarks.. Haha.. I can say that my brain grew by 1 cm larger.. Haha.. So much information on Trademarks law and oso so subjective.. LoLxX.. I can say that after today, i have to courage to crack jokes in class in the future.. Coz today everyone was relaxed and talked alot of craps today.. Haha..

Aiyo.. Cannot slp lehz.. Thinking of wad to buy for her birthday.. ZzZ...

Wierd Photo.. Dunno Y narz wan take this kind of foto... zzz...

BBQ Feelings

2005-10-17T20:45:00.000+08:00

Sianzz.. Now at chalet again.. Skipped school to come chalet.. But it seems kinda boring.. I was so happy to see her today.. The whole group of us went out walking and playing.. When we return to chalet enterance, her right knee started hurting.. I actually wanted to carry her back wan.. But she dun wan.. LoLxX.. If can ah.. I happy sia.. Tomolo den write more.. Now got some "trouble".. Kinda sad today.. Haiz..

After the BBQ, we chatted abit.. I told some lame jokes.. And we started to roast the mashmalow.. We were having fun playing wif the mashmallow.. Haha.. I roasted a mashmallow for herbut she didnt wan.. Haiz.. Felt kinda disappointed.. But aft awhile, she started BBQ-ing the mashmallow.. The funy part is, after the mashmallow turned soft, she didnt wan to eat it.. But the mashmallow is getting more and more 'saggy'.. Haha.. She asked a few ppl to eat but they du wan.. At last she asked me!! Haha.. At first i didnt wan to eat it, but i tot of is as her giving it to me, i fnally ate it.. Although the mashmallow was not speciall made for me, i still felt a special fuzzy feeling.. A feeling that warmth my heart.. I was so overwhelmed wif joy.. Ntg in the world felt better den that little mashmallow..

And after we got sick of BBQ-ing the mashmallow, i started to have a mashmallow war wif Agnes.. Haha.. I dunno how to describe the details, but it was fun and disgusting.. Haha.. All good things eventually will come to an end.. Haiz.. It was time for me to go home.. Whised tat i could had spent more time chatting wif her insteaded of BBQ-ing the food.. Haiz.. Now again i do not know when will i get to see her again.. On the way home, i've already started to miss her.. Haiz.. Guess i'll wait patiently for our next meeting to to be able to see her.. I'll leave everything to fate.. Haiz.. Tats all for tis post..

2005-10-13T10:28:00.000+08:00

Haha.. Its time for me to update my bloggy.. Its been a long time.. :)
Lets see.. So many things happend during the past weeks.. Last week sat and sun, i went to Dhoby Ghaut MRT to perform magic for charity.. It was a meaningful experience for me.. It was my first ever publice performance.. Haha.. It was fun but somehow dreadful.. Singaporeans audience are not sporty and sucks at their attitude.. Although most are wonderful audience, there are still some who are idiotic.. But it was fun fooling the audience.. Haha..

Tis coming Sun, im goin to perform at woodlands library, to promote Republic Poly.. Hope tis time the audience is goin to be better.. Anyone wanna come see me perform?? Haha..

Den next monday i will not be goin to sch coz i will be goin to my ex classmate chalet.. Its been so long since we last met and have fun together.. Really missed those times.. I have a bad feeling that we will slowly drift further apart due to commitments in sch.. Haiz.. I wonder how are we gonna stay in touch when we hardly call each other up to chat or even msn chat.. I really fear the future.. I fear losing her.. I fear everything.. But all things have to come to a conclusion somehow.. I would jus take a step by a time and see how time can change the present and bring us into the future.. I really dun wish to lose her.. And plz gib me another chance.. If i have another chance, i would neber let u leave me at all.. Haiz..

Yesterday, i did something for the first time.. HEHE.. Guess wad... I took my first Neo-Print ever!! Haha.. My frens la... ZzZ.. Psycho me... I try to upload the pic if i can enlarge it.. Haha.. I wan try to get the video and pictures of me performing magic and upload it here.. Haha..

Sianz.. Now sch getting more and more boring.. Haiz.. But the new class is still not tat bad.. Quite ok..

My Current wallpaper..

2005-09-22T11:09:00.000+08:00

Yesterday was a very very happy day for me.. Haha.. My old gang went to her sis house to celebrate one of my frens birthday.. And i get to see her aft so long.. Haha.. We chatted abit den abt 6pm we went off to Kenny house.. I tot i neber gotta tok to again.. But wad made me so happy was that she and pl called me during the movies, and try to play a prank on me, by imitating Mac delivery.. -___-" i noe its lame.. But.... who cares?!! Haha.. Den before the movie end, i get to tok to her.. We chatted for abt 40+mins till my stupid phone Batt die on me!!! Arghh!!! U cant imagine the stress tat i was having... Why do my phone have to die on me when im toking to her???!! But even so, it was a memorable night for me.. Haha.. Im really very happy!

2005-09-16T21:36:00.000+08:00

Whoa! Time flies real fast.. It gonna be chalet time for my classmates in RP.. Omg.. And tomolo will be lantern festival.. Wad to do?... Should i meet my old frens tomolo? Im afraid it will be kinda awkward.. LoLxX.. Haiz.. I havent wash clothes for Sun lehz..!!!! Kaoz!! Arghh..
So sianz.. Yesterday went Jurong IMM there see buy wad for chalet.. LoLxX.. The food there shoik man!! Haha.. Den we crap alot too.. LoLxX.. Best thing is i brought a pint of Anderson's Belgian Chocolate Chips.. Cost me $9.50 sia... Haha.. Worth it but not quite nice..

Do time changes everythings? Or do everything changes wif time? I will neber change, i believe....

2005-09-11T01:30:00.000+08:00

I've already done my best,
but my hopes begin getting less,
my heart stil can't get to its little nest,
so tired,i tink,it badly needs a rest...

why is my love still in a mess?
i always tot, God's giving me a test.
but the tests seems never end,
breaking the heart more, yet to mend..
____________________________

Tis is a poem i tot of.. Jus few days ago.. Dunno nice anot.. But its jus how i feel during tat time.. How i wish i could go back 268 days from now.. Back to the time u said "yes", back to the time my heart stopped when i received ur msg, back to our first date.. Haiz.. How i wished time would turn back.. But, sadly, life goes on..
Days have passed, months have gone, my feelings for u did not die, but instead, it grew stronger.. I believe tat things would work out somehow.. Im hoping for a miracle to happen.. Hiaz.. Btw, Good Luck for ur upcoming exams.. Study well.. Really missed ya..

2005-09-07T23:25:00.000+08:00

Tuesday:
When to Viki's house wif Gavin and Gab to play wif her two big sized gloden retriever.. Haha.. Had so much fun playing wif her dogs sia.. Dirty myself while playing.. Haha.. But nvm.. Coz i love dogs so much.. Haha.. Can u imagine that the male weights 22+kg while the female weights 28+kg? Omg.. The male loved the female too much to let her starve.. Haha.. Tat is y goldie(the female dog) weights sooo heavy while golden(weights so little).. Haha... But, nonetheless, both are huge doggies.. Haha.. Imagine a girl so small sized taking care of tis 2 large dogs!!! Haha.. I've got a taste of caring for jus one of the dog.. I brought Golden out to walk while Gab brought goldie.. Haha.. Instead of us(humans) walking the dogs, its the dogs tat walk us.. Haha.. The dogs literally pulled us around.. Haha.. The best part is that when i let go of Golden leash, he will pick the leash by himself and run to Viki.. -___-" Haha.. Cute sia.. Aft tat day, i noe how hard issit to look after such big dogs.. Haha.. Poor Viki.. :)

After Viki's house, we met Narz at Lot 1 shopping centre for dinner.. Haha.. We went up and down over and over again to look for a suitable "resturant" to eat, and we finally agreed on LJS.. Haha.. We sat there and crap alot.. LoLxX.. Its a pleasure goin out wif them.. Haha..

Today:
Went ice skating in the afternoon.. Coz its Maggie's bday.. Den skate till abt 5pm, went off to meet Narz, Viki, Gab and Gavin.. We went to causeway point to have Sakae Sushi.. We sat there frm 6.30pm till 8+pm.. Haha.. We really crapped alot.. We crapped as much as we ate.. Haha.. The food was OMG... Haha.. But after today, im really broke sia.. Haha.. But it was worth it.. :)

Den after we finished eating, we all went back.. That is when i started to think abt her again.. Haiz.. I passed by Kampong Dayz and Bits and Silver.. The feeling jus came back.. The day that i felt so happy on the first date wif her.. But as i walked pass those shops today, it brings back sad memories.. Haiz.. Den when i board the bus back, i listen to "heaven knows" again.. I repeated the song over and over again.. The more i listened the more i think of her.. Haiz.. I feel lik asking her again.. But i jus felt that the distance between us i growing wider and wider each day.. We are jus lik casual frens liao.. Haiz.. What should i do to keep the distance from widening?? Haiz.. Hope that she do well in her tests.. All i could do now is to wait for her exams to be over and see wad i could do to tok to her more and see how things turn out.. Haiz.. Im really sad now.. Lost and confused.. :S Haiz.... Really hope that she will gib me another chance..

2005-09-01T16:56:00.000+08:00

Haiz... Yesterday went back to secondary school to see teachers.. Den after tat i met my group of frens.. We went to Chong Pang market to have some desserts.. I finaly get to see her again after so long.. Haiz.. But we didnt talked much.. Only a few sentences.. How i wished i could tok to her more.. She still looked so nice.. Den today, when i was listening to a song by Rick Price "Heaven Knows".. I start to think that if i should jus give up.. But its so so so hard.. I wan to ask her for another chance, but i jus didn't know where to start.. Haiz.. I dun think i will give her up so easily.. I will continue to try my best to be wif her again.. I hope tat she will gib me another chance.. Haiz.. Hope to be able to meet her more often during our holidays..

Haiz.. Today is my 2nd last day wif my class.. Its so sad.. Y do we have to change class for each semester??! I love my class alot!! I've got to noe alot of good friends.. A few are even my best buddies.. Hope tat my new class would be as good as this class.. I jus wanna let u guys noe that u rocks!! However, i really wished tat we do not need to change classmates.. Haiz.. But i believe tat we will get to meet each other if we all stay in touch always.. :)

2005-08-29T17:04:00.000+08:00

Omg.. Its been so long since i blogged.. My blog now looks dead.. LoLxX.. But now..., I shall bring it back to life wif my super typing power.. Wahahaha.. -___-" Lame..
Ok.. Lets tok abt recent events.. I just quarreled wif my dad on sat becoz he said tat i promised him that i'll be back before 11pm.. But i did not.. So, he decided to make a big issue out of tis small little thing.. I tried to reason wif him but it was useless.. His mind is full of shit and wouldnt listen to wad i said.. When he knew he couldnt out talk me, he started usin vulgarities and even challenged me to get out of the house.. Actually, on my way back home on the bus, i've already tot of the possible senario, and one of them is being chased out of the house.. He challenged me to leave the house not once, not twice, but 5 times in total.. In the end, i couldn't take his bullSh*t anymore and i decided enough is enough.. I stood up and walked towards the door, wear my shoe, took my keys and opened the door.. He stopped me and said tat i could choose to leave or reason it out wif him.. But i tot to myself, how m i gonna reason it out wif him if he is so stubborn?? But in the end, he stopped me frm leaving.. Den we quarreled abt lots of things before he realise tat it is goin nowhere, den the decided to stop.. Frm 11.35pm quarrel till 1pm.. Look how stubborn is he?! I HATE HIM!!!

Wed is going to be teacher's day.. Goin to skip sch and go back to my secondary sch to visit my ex teachers.. So happy.. And oso can see that special someone.. LoLxX.. Wonder how is she?.. Haha.. Den my class Sept goin to have a chalet.. So good.. Tomolo goin to book liao.. Hope still got vacancy.. Haha..

Sianz sia.. Going to change class next semester.. Hiaz.. Going to miss u guys and gals.. U all gave me so many wonderful memories.. Hope to keep in touch next sem.. Don't forget me.. The class lamer... :)
Wonderful Memories~

2005-07-31T21:35:00.000+08:00

Hiaz.. I had a bad weekend.. Bcoz my mom is down wif fever bcoz of virus infection.. Haiz.. Today jus brought her to TTSH.. Waited damn bloddy long.. Arghh!!! But at least the doctor was good.. He was actually quite friendly and patient.. When we got there, i didnt noe weather my mom is goin to be hospitalised again anot.. So i was feeling quite sad.. Haiz.. But the first thing i wanted to do was to call 'her' and chat.. Coz last time when my mom was hospitalised, i called her to chat to kill boredom.. But now, i dun dare to even msg her.. Haiz.. Den in the end i jus msg a fren to chat.. haiz.. Went there frm 12pm wait till 6pm den finished everything.. Haiz.. Worse still, i myself kanna fever and flu.. Now so weak. Haiz.. Den somemore tis weekend i didnt go out at all.. But its alright la.. Look aft mom more impt..

Den today read the newspaper abt blogging.. jus found out tat there is another blogger out to challenge XiaXue.. Haha.. Tis is critisizing Xia Xue ( NC 16 ) Dun say i neber warn u... Tis is out to challenge her wan.. Haha.. Both quite nice.. Sianz.. Haiz.. Feel so weak and sad now.. Dun wanna write liao.. Till next time..
Tis is my frens photo.. Haha.. I love tis doggy's ears.. Soooo Cute!!!! XD

2005-07-28T13:58:00.000+08:00

Wow.. At last she got tok to me in msn.. Haha.. Happy sia.. Haha.. Last time i was afriad to tok to her in msn coz im afriad she might not reply.. But that day when she talked to me, i was so happy.. I tot tat i neber ever get to tok to her again.. Haha.. But even so, i still feel quite sad.. Coz a part of me still cant let go.. Haiz.. Now i dun even noe will i be free when the whole group of us meet again.. Haiz.. I dunno if i would be really busy or i jus du feel lik goin.. Haiz..

Today in class quite fun la.. Lots of things to do.. Can say quite easy but can oso say quite hard.. Haha.. Kinda miss holidays liao.. Haha.. Coz now is quite boring.. Same routine everyday.. Haha.. My class now lots of prob sia.. Some ppl started to get fustrated wif others, and some jus wont stop boasting(hao lian)... Some started to stop doin work and some have to work doublely hard.. LoLxX.. But..... Im the one slacking.. Haha.. But at least i fell that i got do some work la.. LoLxX..

Haha.. Stupid Nerd Face.. X_X

And tis is the 2 GAYS in my class.. Gab(left) and Luke... Haha..

Tis is wad we do when we have ntg to do in class.. Haha.. Take photos...

2005-07-24T13:46:00.000+08:00

Haiz.. Its been such a long time since i've tok to her.. But i find that i cant stop thinking abt her.. I cant get her out of my life ever since she stepped in.. I tot that time heals all wounds, but it seems that even the wound are healed, there will stil be scars to remind u of the pain.. Haiz.. 7 months seems lik its jus yesterday.. She might have forgotten abt me, but i had not forgotten her.. Because she is such an important person in my life.. I dun noe wad should i do now.. Haiz.. I have to start all over again, but i dun wan to start again.. I wan things to be lik b4.. Haiz.. Its jus couldn't happened... Nobody knows how it feels to be me.. So many things to worry abt.. Cannot find someone to share my ups and downs wif.. Haiz.. When i tot that i've found the certain someone for me, it always turned out for the worst.. Haiz.. Now i dun even wanna continue findin.. I jus wan to remain as it is.. I dun care if she were to gib me another chance anot.. All i noe is tat i'll still be waiting for her.. Haiz.. Life is so cruel..

Tis Photo Taken In Class... Not very Nice LeHz...(oNe HanDeD FaN)

Tis Is Another Photo.. Haha.. In Class Boring La.. Right aft taking tis photo, teacher Looked at me and gave me tis look -___-".. Den She Said " wan take photo later can?? after is say finish wad i wan to say first ma.." den she gave me that look again.. -___-".. Haha.. ( Normal Fan)

2005-07-18T14:20:00.000+08:00

Wah.. Again time to update my blog liao.. So many things happened these few days.. Haha.. Always thinking of the past.. But wad's gone is gone.. We musn't live in the past.. I must move on.. These few days done lots of things.. Played maplestory, played bball.. etc... Haha.. Jus found out tat my classmates some r very childish.. But can't blame them la.. Some 17yrs only.. Haha.. Although some are mature, but some are not.. Haha.. Today i did ntg for my team.. I jus played games the whole day.. Haha.. Feel so restless.. Haiz.. Found a great blog site.. Jus click here.. And enjoy.. Haha..
Tis is me when im playing pool with Kenneth at Far East Shopping Centre.. I looked pro ah.. haha.. But i noob only la.. Haha..

And tis is my new baby blue deck.. Nice hor.. Haha.. Expensive sia..

Hey Guys... I getting bored here.. When u guys are free, plz plz plz call me out!!! Now u all in same sch den i in RP, u all pang seh me.. Kaoz.. U all good lo.. :(

2005-07-08T15:05:00.000+08:00

Haiz.. Long time neber blog liao.. Too busy to even chat.. Many things happened tis few days.. But there were sad moments too.. Started playing maple story a week ago.. Found it quite fun.. Haha.. Luckly still got friends ask me out to relax.. Thanks Viki.. Haha.. Had fun goin out wif potato and u.. Especially the pet shop.. Haha.. Saw 2 Maltese playing wif each other.. Sooo cute... Haha.. Tis few days dunno y no mood to study.. Very restless.. Haiz.. Think alot again.. Maybe ba.. Haiz.. Frens oso got lots of probs.. But i dunno how to help.. Haiz.. Dunno how.. Haiz.. Next week sat den go Ice Skating.. Must relax liao.. Too many things happened liao.. So must relax.. Haiz.. See when free i update again.. Sad-ed.. :(

2005-06-15T14:38:00.000+08:00

Wow.. So fast so many days past liao.. Haha.. Today went back to school to slack.. Go library use net and aircon.. Haha.. Quite lame la.. But better den slacking at home.. LoLxX.. Hope holidays faster end.. Haiz.. So boring these few days.. Ntg to do.. Feel so extra sia.. All my frens studying but i holiday.. Haiz.. So stupid sia.. Dunno weather still will gather out anot.. Now lik neber contact them liao.. Haiz.. Den i oso dun feel lik mixing well wif my sch classmates.. The guys some are lik very childish sia.. Aiyo.. Dunno wad to say oso.. Hope semester 2 change class den will be better ba.. Haiz.. Later semester2 change class worse den tis wan den i die liao.. Haha.. Sianz sia.. So boring now... Dunno wad to do oso.. Haha.. Next time write again.. LoLxX..

2005-06-08T16:51:00.000+08:00

Hiaz.. Today holiday.. Den now in sch library.. Doin ntg.. So sianz.. Later goin buy mouse.. Coz mouse spoil liao.. Haiz.. Mom go Genting den leave me alone at home.. Haiz.. Somemore now sch holiday.. So sad.. I wan do something during holidays but dunno wad to do.. Haiz.. I m goin to rot one day.. Haiz..

2005-06-03T22:30:00.000+08:00

CUTE!!

2005-05-31T23:14:00.000+08:00

Me In ClaSS..

2005-05-31T10:45:00.000+08:00

Haiz.. Sianz.. Cannot stop thinking of things.. Haiz.. So many things to think.. So sad.. Y?? Now i have no aims, no ntg!! Haiz.. Sianz..

(A million words would not bring you back,
i know because i've tried.
Neither would a million tears,
i know because i've cried.)

Nice quote frm someone annoymous..

Sianz.. Now do work liao.. Next time den write..

2005-05-29T15:52:00.000+08:00

Another Nice Wan..